Laugh Until We Fart
Laugh Until We Fart
Season 4 Veterans Day Special with Cam-Mel Toe
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Have you ever wondered what it's like to transform a shed into a chicken coop or pondered the peculiarities of farm life? Join us for a rollicking Veterans Day special as El Crapitan Shane Harges and Taylor Lee, our co-host and self-proclaimed "born-again virgin," brings infectious laughter and quirky charm to the studio. Our conversation jumps from the comical logistics of fertilized eggs at Ripper Ranch to the bizarre world of balut, all while celebrating the lighter side of military service. With playful nods to troops' memories like the infamous duck walk at MEPS, we honor veterans with humor and heart.
From the chaos of political antics to the hilarity of everyday mishaps, our banter is as unpredictable as it is entertaining. We humorously tackle political figures and groups, like "White Dudes for Harris" and reflect on leadership dynamics with a comedic flair. Meanwhile, personal stories of unexpected flatulence in public places and debates over the best chicken sandwiches offer relatable and laugh-out-loud moments. Whether discussing vacation tales or the appeal of comfort food havens like Cracker Barrel, our exchanges are filled with warmth and wit.
We also navigate the unique challenges of military training and service, sharing anecdotes of sniper school aspirations and convoy missions in Kosovo. From the nostalgia of MREs to the thrill of sniper marksmanship, our stories highlight the camaraderie and humor found in military life. As we express gratitude to veterans and their families, we invite you to engage with us through live streaming, ensuring an interactive and enjoyable experience. Prepare for a whirlwind of laughter, reflection, and appreciation as we bring you an episode filled with unforgettable moments and heartfelt thanks to those who serve.
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Thank you. Sit back. I know that you're gonna have a good laugh, bringing you the comedy that you really need. Keep it entertaining you better believe. So let's get it popping. No more talk. Gonna make us laugh until we fart. Shane hargis, that's who we want. Gonna make us laugh until we fart. Shane hargis, that's who we want. Gonna make us laugh until we fart.
Speaker 3Oh baby, we are back in studio, toot and scoot and live streaming on the YouTubes. Don't be scared, don't be scared, don't be scared. What?
Speaker 4does that mean?
Speaker 3I don't know what it means. I'm not Apparently, if people go to YouTube and search Shane Hargis comedy, click the channel. Click the there should be a live on there. Click the live Ba-boom.
Speaker 1I see us right now. I see us right now, so can't show boobies.
Speaker 3I will try to keep mine up.
Speaker 6Keep your boobies up.
Speaker 3Yeah, I got my training bra on. You want to perk it?
Speaker 6I got my eight cup bra on. Those are bees man, those are solid bees.
Speaker 7Solid.
Speaker 6Thank you, thank you I made it myself. I might do the whole show cupping them.
Speaker 3It feels kind of good, I like to do it Comforting.
Speaker 6Oh okay, it's a girl thing.
Speaker 1Girls do that just like dudes cup their balls for comfort.
Speaker 3Yes, let's do some introductions, hi. Okay, I'm El Crapatan, your captain of this ship. I will not go down with it though.
Speaker 8Oh, that's fucking rude, I know.
Speaker 3As always, your co-host Yay, your born-again virgin co-host, taylor Lee, finally got here.
Speaker 1Babe, babe, babe. Sorry, some of us have to work.
Speaker 3Loser. And I'm still poor and then back with us for another Veterans Day special. Our good friends, super fans of the podcast.
Speaker 7Camel.
Speaker 1Toe Camel.
Speaker 6Toe, that's fun.
Speaker 1That's my new nickname for you we combined it together.
Speaker 3The Camel Toes.
Speaker 4Camel Toes you sound like you're from my new nickname for you.
Speaker 6We combined it together the Camel Toes Camel.
Speaker 3Toes.
Speaker 1You sound like you're from Tennessee. Huh, you sound like you're from Tennessee.
Speaker 10Well, maybe sometimes you are the Tennessee accent game again. I don't want to.
Speaker 3None of us are good at it and off camera your former OKS co-host ever.
Speaker 9Where Casey?
Speaker 6Su? Where is okayest co-host ever? Where Casey Sue? Where is she? Zoom in on her many tacos resumed in, say hi.
Speaker 3Resumed in on you say hi.
Speaker 7I wouldn't knock out hey thank you for your service thank you for your service buddy veterans
Speaker 3day special and veterans out there watching listening shooting service. Buddy Veterans Day special. And veterans out there watching listening shooting guns dropping bombs America. Thank you for your service. Thank you for your service. Don't you knock over the camera. We're live. Why did?
Speaker 4my voice crack, I don't know. I love it.
Speaker 3And my balls dropped. My love it and my balls dropped. My voice cracked and my balls dropped.
Speaker 11It's your day. It's because it's your day, it is my day, that's right, it's your day.
Speaker 9Veterans Day makes your.
Speaker 1Ball whatever.
Speaker 4Yeah, you wouldn't know yeah you wouldn't know, girl Exactly, maybe what does? That have to do with it, maybe it's second puberty, she got no, she got, she got I've seen it in there.
Speaker 6She got nothing. Oh, you see what where?
Speaker 11come again, her nova what a nova vulva my fishy kiss.
Speaker 3Oh, that's the back, maybe the back. The back I meant to the cyclops kick us off with a little, with a little opener video here.
Speaker 9If you have a little friend back here, hello, let's go over here.
Speaker 3Let's share a little video. Watch this with me folks yes.
Speaker 2I love watching.
Speaker 7How you move your hips, girl, make me hypnotized. How you like your eggs, I like them.
Speaker 2They're easy.
Speaker 3I don't think they're really talking about that?
Speaker 8How do you like your eggs? They're talking about them.
Speaker 3What are they talking about?
Speaker 1I think they're talking about.
Speaker 3Actually cooking breakfast.
Speaker 1Yeah, ovulation.
Speaker 2I think it's ovulation.
Speaker 3Do you have fertilized eggs at?
Speaker 6breakfast yes, you can if you have a rooster, that's true If you have a cock.
Speaker 11Do tell that's true. Yeah, if you have a cock.
Speaker 1Tell us more.
Speaker 11Do tell, do tell.
Speaker 1If your chickens are fucking.
Speaker 6You're going to be eating, y'all like chickens, and your rooster's doing his job. Your eggs are fertilized, so does that mean you're eating a baby chick?
Speaker 11Yeah, no, because they haven't developed into it's still a yolk.
Speaker 6They have to be incubated. So you're eating a chicken fetus. It's not even a fetus, yet technically it doesn't have a heartbeat. It's a yolk.
Speaker 3Jordan out.
Speaker 6Now, if we were to incubate them for 21 days, yuck Balut, but they're still just like normal, just gooey.
Speaker 12If you were offered a million dollars.
Speaker 1Would you eat balut? What is Balut?
Speaker 11It's when they're almost hatched, they're a little bit crunchy. They have feathers Are they chickens or ducks.
Speaker 3I won't even eat chickens or ducks A meal.
Speaker 11I couldn't do that. We went to the Asian market and my mistake Bought eggs. Oh, scrambled eggs.
Speaker 6Who did that I was, like I was a person for that conversation yeah, hard lesson.
Speaker 3Walmart sets are better why do you know so much about the chickens?
Speaker 4yeah, go ahead, ma'am, because we have chickens and turkeys we love them in my house At Ripper Ranch.
Speaker 6That's where I was going for that's right. That's where we have our chickens, that's nice. Our beautiful babies, we love them. They survived the tornado just recently.
Speaker 11Yes, I was going to ask about that that was insane, did everybody make it.
Speaker 6Everybody survived, oh good.
Speaker 11Physically, every single one Mentally Except for their son.
Speaker 3He flew away, no telling where he's at he's out in the wilderness New York by now. Maybe, oh, lincoln, yeah.
Speaker 6Maybe, he's feral. I'll see him in a few days. Well, he's looking for the tickets, he'll survive. Yeah, he'll be fine, he's too nice.
Speaker 4He's so sweet, he'll get adopted by anybody An angel. I know he is an angel, angel baby.
Speaker 6Not anybody, though, he's Mike.
Speaker 7Possessive, my friend lives out-ish where you live. I don't know exactly where, but she lost her house.
Speaker 6Dang. Yeah, it's bad, the devastation. I mean we were so lucky. It came kind of diagonal through our neighbor's backyard and through our backyard and hit the backside of our house and our backyard and then it went diagonal and jumped over into another neighborhood and that whole neighborhood leveled like less than 300 yards. And we, us and our neighbor, our immediate neighbor, are the only ones that got any damage in our neighborhood.
Speaker 7So it kind of clipped the edge of our neighborhood. It's insane, yeah, she's off like triple X.
Speaker 4Yes, we're off.
Speaker 6Peabody, so that's just a mile to the yeah what over. So yeah, it was crazy. It was really scary. I'm so glad you're here. Yeah, it was really scary. Alive, we're all good, and all of our turkeys actually roost outside of the coop, they roost on top or in the trees and I was like, oh, they're gone. I mean, how can you potentially hold on? And we went out there at what? 3?
Speaker 6am yeah it was about 3 am when it passed over us and we got out of the bathroom and we all kind of collected ourselves for a minute and just stood there and we're like I was ready we were like looking I was going you know, I'm saying like looking for the roof right to make sure it was still there, because it was literally so loud, yeah, like the noise was so scary.
Speaker 6Basically, yeah, it sounds like a freight train and we are from South Florida so we're used to hurricanes, so we're no stranger to natural disasters We've been through. I lived through Hurricane Andrew, which is arguably the worst hurricane that ever went through Miami.
Speaker 6And I was only four, but I remember my mom putting us under a mattress in the living room and just like holding us down my brother and I and the dog, yeah, and she was just like hey, hopefully you know you're fine, whatever. But yeah it was. We were sitting in the bathroom just kind of all holding each other, like well, I guess. Yeah, you know this is it man, I don't know.
Speaker 11Wow, you kind of start to panic. About 1.30, I woke up because body has metal and it was telling me, hey, there's something weird going on. It was eerily like. So I turned on the, the news, and you know the the meteorologist was like, ah, get to your safe zone. I'm like, oh, shoot. And then I felt the house just like suctioning. Bizarre like it felt like it was breathing. So I ran straight to our bedroom, grabbed my boy.
Speaker 6Told me let's go and dude we just went into the bathroom yeah I mean this inner bar part of our house, and we just were sitting there and you could just hear it. Yeah, and it was just so overwhelmingly loud and you could just hear the debris hitting you know you just, you're just like okay, hopefully nothing flies in here and impales me or whatever, sucks windows out. I'm not sure, yeah, and then when it passed, we all went outside because I was like, oh my God, my chickens, of course.
Speaker 11She was like. She was like tearing my chickens. I was upset.
Speaker 6I mean, it's like it's and it's scary. Yeah, you know, when I, when we came out of the bathroom, you're still running on high like you're running on adrenaline and you literally are just like Lincoln was asleep. Thank God he didn't even really realize what was happening. That's good, so we just laid him back down.
Speaker 6He kind of went back to sleep. But him and I ran out to the backyard and I was like looking at the devastation. I mean to see what if we had a yard, if we had a house, the back part of our house or whatever, and our neighbors? The whole fence got blown down and they were in our yard because his coop had got picked up and like twisted and mangled and flung into our yard and he was pulling chickens out of debris.
Speaker 11It looked like. It looked like aluminum foil, Just mangled metal like not flimsy like plywood.
Speaker 6I mean, it was like a built coop and he was digging out all his chickens, and all his chickens survived too. Yeah, we found one crazy, pinned up under our ac unit and we pulled her out and we just were like grabbing them all and I'm just like where's all my chickens and some of ours where we had a pool. The pool got thrown and like mangled all up and we had a couple that were under the pool, some that were under fencing. We had like patio furniture that had got blown up against the fence and they were under the furniture, our blackstone.
Speaker 6The top got ripped and like melted like yeah, it's like cast iron solid past and it's twisted.
Speaker 11The top of it got twisted it's twisted it was wild, but all of our animals survived, and I'm like shocked when we went outside the first thing was, hey, she's gonna go check out the chickens. But when I saw my neighbor like out there, my first thought was either his kids, yeah. Wives. So I ran to him and I'm like, hey, what's up.
Speaker 6Are you okay, and he's like he has a little headline.
Speaker 11He's like my chickens, we're like who are you looking for? Are you looking for?
Farm Life and Political Banter
Speaker 6a human or a because he's got two kids and a wife. I mean we're like thinking the worst case scenario. You know and we know his wife works nights at the casino. So I'm like, oh god, what if she came home and got stuck in it or something? And we were just like freaking out, but it, it all ended up fine nobody got hurt neighbors are fine yeah you really see like community support come together when people yeah and we got our neighborhood.
Speaker 6Uh, there's power. There's only one way in and one way out. It's pretty small and the power poles got all like yeah, they, they were basically at the entrance. So we're stuck, we couldn't leave or go anywhere. So we were like, ok, we're kind of SOL.
Speaker 11Does the post work and snap right in the middle?
Speaker 6Oh yeah.
Speaker 11Like on the road.
Speaker 11we couldn't leave and we were just like water was everywhere, so we were like, yeah, like our neighbors, like, oh, his, his rocking chair that he has at the front of his house was grabbed and like thrown three houses down into a little ravine where, like the power line's at. When we saw it I was like, hey, well, they taught us in Miami. It was like if you see down power lines and you see water, leave it alone. And he looked at me and he goes yeah, I'm not touching that thing, I'm good yeah, for sure.
Speaker 6But so yeah, he goes. Yeah, I'm not touching that thing, I'm good Water and electricity is a no-go in any state, yeah, for sure, but so yeah, it was wild.
Speaker 11It could have been worse.
Speaker 6We're super lucky that we didn't have any loss of life or anything.
Speaker 1I'm so glad y'all are okay and I'm really glad the chickens are okay, and all my turkeys.
Speaker 6One of our turkeys is blind, and he was the one that I when I came outside to look at him, I did start crying because he's the one I'm the most attached to and I've raised him since he was a baby and he's like I don't know special needs, whatever.
Speaker 11He's blind.
Speaker 6I feel like that death would have impacted me the most. I think because he wouldn't have seen it coming, maybe in my mind.
Speaker 11Literally.
Speaker 6Literally Ray Charles I didn't see what this scene is. You know what I'm saying. He wouldn't have had a chance to fly up or whatever. No, it needs to be Ray Charles. His name is Demarcus Anthony Copeland III. I'm so sorry. White Chicks is my favorite movie if you guys didn't catch that reference he's an angel.
Speaker 6He's actually named after yeah, she went and hugged him oh my god and I'm like grabbed him and he's like a 40 pound chicken but I or turkey. But I was like, I was like demarcus is in the group and I started crying.
Speaker 11I was like, oh my god, fuck the other guys in the meantime I'm trying to tell her can we go? Cause we got things to do like it's 3 o'clock in the morning.
Speaker 6We gotta figure out what's going on nah, man, I'm not turkey, I'm not turkey baby. Yet I'm bringing him in the house.
Speaker 12He's coming inside he's going to my bed.
Speaker 4I love you, but you're staying outside.
Speaker 6Well, thankfully we have a big. We converted a big shed it's like what, eight by five or something into a coop. We have two smaller coops attached and then we have it actually fenced in and like with a top or whatever, like a run. So they're all living it up in there and they're so mad. They never get confined like that because we always open it every morning and let them free range in our acre or whatever.
Speaker 3So how do you choose which one's going to be the fried chicken or the turkey leg or Thanksgiving Day bird? They don't, is there?
Speaker 6just a random that ain't this kind of farm?
Speaker 3We can use the eggs and.
Speaker 6I save their feathers because I like making little cracks with their feathers, and that's about as far as it goes. They are pets, we love them. They. That's about as far as it goes. They are pets, we love them, they are pets.
Speaker 3And they are good eggs, they're fantastic and they're fantastic cleaners too. They keep our property clean. Yeah, I don't think I could.
Speaker 6I'll just eat the eggs. I can't, I don't want to.
Speaker 4Dispatch them.
Speaker 3I've seen when a chicken's been slaughtered and they do the chopping of the head, yeah, and the body is just running around the yard.
Speaker 6It's bad they did that. We actually had a dispatch. We had a really really mean, really mean rooster. We had to take him to the farm and he went to live on the farm. This is what Lincoln knows about him. We had to dispatch him and it was it's like the train station yellow stone. Bloody fest man, yeah he went to the farm, yeah during a full moon, sacrifice and that's.
Speaker 1That's why you got skin walkers.
Speaker 6We're convinced that we don't have skin walkers because they're scared of us because, we dispatched a chicken on the full moon, yeah, I was bloodshed blood. I just sat in the dirt for a minute because I was like, wow, that was really aggressive. What just happened. Yeah, that's the farm life. That's part of it.
Speaker 3Well, in other news.
Speaker 11What we're live.
Speaker 3We are live.
Speaker 8There's a group called White Dudes for Harris. Have you seen this?
Speaker 12Oh boy.
Speaker 8Anybody know, are some of you here White Dudes for?
Speaker 5Harris White Dudes, but I'm not one of them at all, because their wives and their wives' lovers are all voting for me.
Speaker 3Oh, say hello to your next president of the United States.
Speaker 1Was that Jim Gaffigan next to him? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 9Oh, it really was. Yes, get out of here. Yes, it's the Smith dinner.
Speaker 11They have it every year, Mm-hmm oh my God.
Speaker 3And Harris was not there. People get roasted, yeah, and Harris didn't go Shocker it and harris was not there. Roasted, yeah, and harris didn't go shocker it was a wild world, amazing, no like, and uh, tony hinchcliffe was there and made, is that?
Speaker 6when he made the puerto rico joke. Hey yeah dude.
Speaker 11Yeah, and that was so that joke very pg-13 compared to the stuff that he comes out of his mouth.
Speaker 6Oh yeah right, yeah, for sure.
Speaker 3And he is a roast comic, yeah, so that's all he's going to do. So you knew what you were getting.
Speaker 4Don't expect anything else. That shouldn't be a surprise.
Speaker 3Right, right, and it's all in fun and joking.
Speaker 7No, it's Suey's business.
Speaker 5Oh God, You're one of them fun and joking.
Speaker 3No, it's Suey's business. Oh God You're one of them, you're one of them. You're one of them, yeah. So what is?
Speaker 1it.
Speaker 3Number 47? He's number 47 now 47. Trump. What's everybody think about that. I mean because he, I'm scared, he kind of won big-ish. I'm a little scared, you're a little scared. A lot of people are, a lot of people are I don't know.
Speaker 1I mean what are we going to do now?
Speaker 11I don't know what to think. Hold on, hey, he defeated two female presidential candidates.
Speaker 9Two.
Speaker 11Two, yeah, hillary.
Speaker 9Clinton and.
Speaker 11Harris.
Speaker 4Yikes.
Speaker 3Well, here's the thing. My opinion is give us a woman that we want to vote for. It's not that I don't want to vote for whoever, but it's got to be the right one. For me, it just can't be. Well, she's a person of color and she's a woman.
Speaker 1No, she's in my opinion.
Speaker 3an idiot, she's an idiot. Tulsi Gabbard, I'm on board.
Speaker 6Or Candace Owens too. Yes, I don't agree with everything about Tulsi Whenard.
Speaker 3I'm on board, or Candace Owens too. Yes, she's great. I don't agree with everything about Tulsi. When she ran for president, I looked at her platform, dude, and there were things that I couldn't get behind. However, you don't agree with someone 100% of the time, not?
Speaker 11even your spouse. We don't agree 100% of the time.
Speaker 6What Are you serious?
Speaker 3See, just like now, we don't agree See Case in point.
Speaker 11Hey, did you ever see Tulsi's debate with Harris and she just dismantled her?
Speaker 1Yeah, he had a whole don't know about it.
Speaker 6I think, he would like.
Speaker 1Tulsi's butthole.
Speaker 5Oh yeah.
Speaker 11The Hershey kiss. No, no, no. Wasn't she a lieutenant carol?
Speaker 7that noise no, I don't know. Thank you for your service thank you for your service.
Speaker 3Thank you yeah um what what I don't remember.
Speaker 8This is America. You dumb son of a bitch, Love it.
Speaker 3Okay, yeah, I don't know about you guys. Oh boy, what did you just throw out of?
Speaker 6your butt. He has a secret kangaroo stash of cock rubs in his butt hole you weren't going to get it.
Speaker 10It's in his prison pocket.
Speaker 3You don't get first when you come in.
Speaker 4You learned things in the.
Speaker 2Navy and how to keister.
Speaker 10That's right, I'm kistering.
Speaker 8He's keister.
Speaker 11Well, so I have this cough.
Speaker 6You're like an old man, you carry cough drops they came in with like a sand-sized bag.
Speaker 3I mean you are a person of color, but we weren't going to frisk you as you came into the house.
Speaker 6I'm not frisking.
Speaker 3You could have just kept it in your jean pocket instead of prison pocket.
Speaker 6He can't reach his front pocket, oh yeah.
Speaker 11You like it.
Speaker 6I do, I love it Hi.
Speaker 8Show them your boots off. Show them my boots, my boots.
Speaker 6And them socks. Where's Waldo?
Speaker 4Look at my boots.
Speaker 10Now, there we go. Now it's American.
Speaker 6I got my muck baits on.
Speaker 3I gotta do this one again.
Speaker 8This is America, you dumb son of a bitch. Okay, Beautiful.
Speaker 6Spanx, they're fresh.
Speaker 4This is their maiden voyage.
Speaker 6What kind are they?
Speaker 1You gotta break them in Justin.
Speaker 6What kind are they?
Speaker 1I have no idea. You've got to break them in Do rainbows.
Speaker 6Justin, what, ariana, what, what? Who are these people?
Speaker 10Ariana. Who's Justin? Who's Justin.
Speaker 3They're Ariana Grande's. Is that what I heard?
Speaker 1Watch your voice crack, I don't know. Second puberty.
Speaker 8No, the second ball dropped, I think I don't know, Is that going to be so saggy, Casey? Oh my God.
Speaker 3They free-fill, I think they hit terminal velocity.
Speaker 6Terminal. Now they have space for Braille.
Speaker 3I'm going to get him Botoxed, or something.
Unfiltered Conversation and Snack Sampling
Speaker 6On his knees. That's how far they're going. Ew Can.
Speaker 7I please have a Dada.
Speaker 3Can you get me a beer, please? Thank, you.
Speaker 1Anybody else need a beer? That was equivalent to you snapping at me no, don't drink.
Speaker 11Oh, doing this.
Speaker 1Yes.
Speaker 11He's winking at you.
Speaker 6Not the winks. No, I don't like it when he winks. He looks creepy when he winks.
Speaker 1Oh my hair got caught Because I do it on purpose.
Speaker 6Does anybody need anything? It's brown eyes Winking is just Normalized.
Speaker 1I have Topo Chico, do you want?
Speaker 11to what is Topo Chico?
Speaker 2Seltzer.
Speaker 11It's Topo Chico, it's a seltzer.
Speaker 6You want one.
Speaker 11I thought she said soft serve In a can. Soft serve in a can. Yes, counting my calories. Keeping it light and fit Hot girl winter Already got my boots going.
Speaker 1Winter's the best, because then you can just wear sweats, sweaters.
Speaker 8I was checking the stream Cozy Cozy time Checking the stream.
Speaker 3I hope it's, still streaming Is it nice? It's probably like on the stream oh, I got a strong, I got a healthy flow Ew.
Speaker 7Casey does he?
Speaker 11have a healthy flow.
Speaker 6He pees real loud in the morning.
Speaker 11That's a good urethra, does he?
Speaker 6fart, he farts all the time.
Speaker 3That's when I knew I hit over the hill Because I used to hear old guys in the bathroom as a kid they would go pee and they always farted.
Speaker 6In the back door, get a little air out. Fucking gross, turbo and gross.
Speaker 11Turbo and then one day Get some air out.
Speaker 3One day it happened, I peed.
Speaker 6Oh my God, and you got it.
Speaker 11And you're like oh.
Speaker 4Geronimo.
Speaker 11Geronimo.
Speaker 6Eureka, I'm old now I'm old now Is that what it is when it slips out I'm old now. I'm old now, is that?
Speaker 4what it is when it slips out. You're old, oh man.
Speaker 9Dude, I was rounding the court and it was just like I didn't even know there was a world behind you.
Speaker 11She got the burst mode.
Speaker 6Uh-oh, must be it. I don't know, man. Yeah, speed bump, is that what it's called?
Speaker 9Yeah, is that a hemorrhoid?
Speaker 6I don't want to talk about that. I don't want to talk about that. Oh crap, chan farted himself out of the aisle at the store one time. Oh my God.
Speaker 1Oh yeah.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 11Do tell what happened.
Speaker 3I try to do that with other shoppers, Like I'll come around a corner. Yeah and I fart and I get away real quick and see if anybody comes around. No, he doesn't. He doesn't do that, he doesn't do that.
Speaker 6The barrier. Setting up the trap.
Speaker 3No, but one time I farted in an aisle and I couldn't get away from it and I had to. I went pushing her with the cart. She's in front. I'm like what the?
Speaker 11the car she's in front. It's a heat seeking missile.
Speaker 1It was just chasing me down it was really bad nice, very nice, mine's usually when the kids are with me and they don't know and they don't care, and they just, oh my god.
Speaker 6Lincoln's always like it's okay, the house farted dude every time he comes in clutch man, that kid knows it he protects her every single time the house farted dude every time he comes in. Clutch man that kid knows it.
Speaker 11That's right. He protects her every single time.
Speaker 6I'm playing two versus one I think it's because from birth he's always told lincoln that he has to like watch over me. So lincoln basically just like babies me for the most part. If he gets in any way type of way towards me, like it's like, stop talking to my mom, like this, and I'm like come at me, bro, you'll like that. And I'm like come at me bro, You're a protector. He'll get you on your fucking ankles.
Speaker 11What is he going to do to a four-year-old In your shins, he'll fuck you up real quick, he said four.
Speaker 6He said 40. 40? Oh, I thought you said 40-year-old. I'm talking about you.
Speaker 7He's 48.
Speaker 8What? Close enough, Dan. You're 48. Not yet. You're 48 in two weeks. Yeah, you have 20 days until you're 48.
Speaker 1So I'm not 48, yet he has a turkey baby Mm-hmm.
Speaker 11His balls haven't dropped yet.
Speaker 6So you're 47. Yes, I have Three times he's your 37.
Speaker 9So you guys are exactly 10 years apart, and his birthday's in a couple weeks too.
Speaker 6When's your birthday 17.
Speaker 1117.
Speaker 6Cuties.
Speaker 7We're 10 years apart.
Speaker 6We are Extra cute. What are you talking about?
Speaker 8Fremboy oh wait, wait, wait. I don't know what you're talking about Hold on hold
Speaker 5on Do it.
Speaker 3So Fremboy and Taylor might have gone on a Do it. So Frimboy and Taylor might have gone on a little vacation.
Speaker 6I heard about it and I have secret video of it, there was backdoor action.
Speaker 8No, there was not Backdoor of your cabin, obviously.
Speaker 6Where you saw the elephants Peeking.
Speaker 3Let me show you what happened. You ready, I'm ready I don't think so, baby doll.
Speaker 8Hey y'all, baby doll, I'm sitting out here with my wife, shelly Poop. We are fucked up. We are loving life. We're having a goddamn drink of poo, ain't we baby? What are you doing? Are you petting the doll? Pet? What are you doing? Are you petting the dog? Petting the dog. I love you. You are my main white girl.
Speaker 11You're my main white girl.
Speaker 8I love you. So how many dogs do you have in your lap right now?
Speaker 6Because I gotta have another goddamn drink. I'm confusing the orientation of this. She fell down on the ground. She's sitting on the ground.
Speaker 8This goddamn pregnant zone and whiskey.
Speaker 11Pregnantone and whiskey. Oh, look at that.
Speaker 6Oh, my God.
Speaker 8Oh, my God.
Speaker 11That's a lot of licking.
Speaker 8He's licking his butt. I love y'all. We are fucked up. We're getting goddamn right. We're getting.
Speaker 11Super redneck.
Speaker 6I mean, I can see it.
Speaker 11Looks like he's drinking and taking Molly's.
Speaker 8Oh golly, yeah, that was goddamn straight whiskey.
Speaker 4So how was it?
Speaker 3That's Edmund. How was?
Speaker 1it man? I think so. I think that's Johnny to be, is it, ed I?
Speaker 6think so, I don't know. Blackie.
Speaker 3So how was vacation?
Speaker 8It looked like it was pretty fun he didn't go to Tennessee, I didn't know you could go to Tennessee and Georgia just driving down the street, one turn, that's how close they are.
Speaker 6Which one? Well, yeah, they're two yeah. Which one? Well, yeah, they're touching what did you say?
Speaker 3you didn't know you could get from somewhere to somewhere like yeah that's where roads go they just gotta go what?
Speaker 8they direct hotels in tennessee, and in the mornings we would you know, gotta get your head right. So we would drive and we be in georgia.
Speaker 11No, gotta, get your head right, so we would all drive and we'd be in Georgia Road head.
Speaker 8No, gotta get your head right. So we would all just be in Georgia and just make a loop and go to Cracker Barrel.
Speaker 6Cracker Barrel, dang Cracker Barrel. I'll tell you what.
Speaker 8We're gonna go to all 87 Cracker Barrels. We've got two down.
Speaker 3Do you got a pen? Do you got?
Speaker 8a little spreadsheet with a red line have you gone to Cracker Barrel in Norman?
Speaker 10No, norman, there's one in Edmond, like double date it, triple date it.
Speaker 11Triple date. It we're down. Triple date it.
Speaker 4I love Cracker Barrel.
Speaker 11Dude their steak and eggs on point, on point.
Speaker 9I got the chicken rice steak.
Speaker 6It's pretty good. Oh, and the breakfast.
Speaker 2It's a half-brown casserole man.
Speaker 6I tell you what.
Speaker 3It's good. It's not the best, but it's also not the worst. I would probably choose Cracker Barrel or Denny's.
Speaker 6The one in Midway City is trash. You want a side of meth and Carl's Jr.
Speaker 11Every time I see their commercials.
Speaker 3I get sick to my stomach this one loves. Carl's.
Speaker 6Jr.
Speaker 11He had a silent standing ovation ceremony when they closed the one in Midway City. He said I drove there wanting an avocado burger.
Speaker 6I'm making one of those at home, damn.
Speaker 3Speaking of eating at places, we have some special snacks.
Speaker 1Yeah, gross Speaking of eating at places.
Speaker 3Oh, okay, we have some special snacks? We have a tour. And I got these special snacks.
Speaker 6Someone said you have a healthy streak.
Speaker 3It's my illegitimate son from the north. Oh, buddy, hey, he's a future veteran.
Speaker 6Wow, thank you for your service. Oh, buddy.
Speaker 3hey, he's a future veteran, oh wow thank you for your service and Justin when you where is he right now?
Speaker 11what is he doing? Is he in boot camp?
Speaker 3not yet. He's not even there yet he's ready and I think he ships out, maybe after the first year, so he already signed. I think he's not even there yet.
Speaker 11He's ready and I think he ships out, maybe after the first year, so he already signed, I think. So Holy shit, that's awesome.
Speaker 6Good on him. Oh, and he said Waffle House for the win. I do like Waffle.
Speaker 11House. Waffle House is good. The hookers.
Speaker 3The switchblades as long as my next stop is home.
Speaker 11Waffle House is good. The stripper fights the bidet.
Speaker 3I try not to go at that time of night anymore.
Speaker 11Oh, dude, that's the excitement.
Speaker 8That's at 2 in the afternoon 2 in the afternoon On a Tuesday.
Speaker 11What do you have there?
Speaker 3From my favorite dispensary in Norman, noble Dispensary, and they have the prettiest bags I've ever seen. I like these bags, but anyway, these are not infused snacks.
Speaker 6Did you hear that they're?
Speaker 3THC free. Yes, they're just.
Speaker 6For our federal workers.
Speaker 3Thank you, there are snacks from.
Speaker 6Egypt. I want to reiterate that Snacks from Egypt, I want to reiterate that Japan.
Speaker 11Not in America. Weird stuff here, what?
Speaker 4the fuck are weird stuff. I had to get them before the tariffs started.
Speaker 3We're sampling the damn tiers, so I have these first. They're special for Taylor. Oh, what is that? Crackers corn.
Speaker 1Ranchito Crackers corn. I am a crackers corn, yeah, crackers.
Speaker 3Ranchito Crackers. So we need to try this. I think these are from Egypt.
Speaker 11Oh hang on. Yeah, look at that.
Speaker 6I want to go there.
Speaker 11And then we got.
Speaker 3We got some, we got some.
Speaker 11That sounds like something I'll tell Mel. Hey Mel, can I get some yin-yang?
Speaker 6Is this Nutella? This is Nutella.
Speaker 3Justin says boot camp is January 14th.
Speaker 11Yes, Okay so he has been to the doctor that you know.
Speaker 3drop your drawers, yes yes, let's check him out. Yes, now I'm bent over, let me check your drawers. Yes, let's check him out. Yes, now I'm bent over, let me check your hole.
Speaker 11So, talking about veterans, do you mind if I share this story real quick? No, do it? So I went into MEPS not knowing what the hell I was getting into.
Speaker 2What's MEPS?
Speaker 11So MEPS is like the prerequisite for medical exams to see if you're healthy.
Speaker 6It's yeah where you go to like.
Speaker 11I don't know what it says for medical exam peace. They do all your medical stuff. Yeah, they check you out, mental, all that stuff. And I remember I walked in they're like hey, you gotta pee in a cup, and I'm a shy peer. It took me an hour, oh my God. Yeah, the dude knew my penis by the time I peed.
Speaker 6So that's how you knew you were staring at it for so long. Yeah, exactly.
Generator Woes and Bidet Nostalgia
Speaker 11So check on that Navy boy. And then we had to go to the Bengay doctor because his office smelled like Bengay and he's like, hey, get naked, leave your you know your boxers on. I said, ok, he checked. You know, oh, your sp, oh, your spine is good, your shoulders, all that. And then he's like, pull down your doors. And I said so I put him like right to the middle of my thigh. He said no, I need him down all the way to the ankles.
Speaker 3How disrespectful and he grabbed and you were standing like this oh dude dude, I had nothing.
Speaker 11And I remember this dude pulled my sack Like he was reading like the newspaper.
Speaker 10Yeah, it was an e-reader he was reading the Bible.
Speaker 11He grabbed my testicles. He was trying to figure out, like how many sperm I had in there.
Speaker 12That's how detailed.
Speaker 11He had a big old nose, so I was very afraid that if I coughed. So anyways.
Speaker 8Did he have gloves?
Speaker 11on yeah.
Speaker 10Oh my god.
Speaker 4Either way it was traumatic for me.
Speaker 11It was black and white, I don't remember much.
Speaker 6And then he goes hey, I need you to look at the sink.
Speaker 11So I looked at the sink and he said, hey, I need you to look at the sink. So I looked at the sink and he said no, I need you to look at it. And I looked at it while he's in front of me and he's like no, I need you to turn around and bend over and grab your ankles, oh.
Speaker 6I don't even know your name. Take me to dinner first. Why?
Speaker 11And that was his first experience For your country, for your country. Yeah, he looked like my little poop star.
Speaker 6Chocolate starfish.
Speaker 3Hey, shout out to Justin for bringing up the episode Burlap Boyfriends. That was a good episode With all the boys, a socky box. And hey, we love you too. Dude, proud of you what was that.
Speaker 11Oh, so he's going to Michigan.
Speaker 1He's in Michigan right now.
Speaker 3He lives there, maybe, I don't know. Do you live in Michigan?
Speaker 11Yeah, we were talking through the stream.
Speaker 3I love it. He says I was first in every testing room and first one out of the building and I dropped my shorts and stepped out of them and even farted a little bit when he was checking things out.
Speaker 11He deserved it, like a true sailor. Like a true sailor, I didn't know I was getting into.
Speaker 8He just took them all the way off.
Speaker 11He's like what's up, bro, let's go, let's go.
Speaker 8Do they look in your butthole? For a reason he's in Minnesota right now I think he's in Justin, maybe in your butthole for a reason he's in.
Speaker 3Minnesota, right now.
Speaker 1I think he's in Michigan I don't know In.
Speaker 6Yeah, he's in Minnesota, right now they make you cough to make sure nothing comes out.
Speaker 11No, they made you cough.
Speaker 6When he asked me to cough, I did that.
Speaker 11I need you to cough.
Speaker 6Hemorrhoids maybe. Yeah, he's checking hemorrhoids.
Speaker 3I didn't have them then.
Speaker 1I was clear Is that I didn't have them. Then I was clear. Is that how?
Speaker 6Casey checks bend over and grab them. What Casey does not check? Good on you like a true trooper going to the jungle by yourself. You get it, you get it no, I have had to look at his butthole. Here we go, story time, talk about it story time.
Speaker 3We've talked about it.
Speaker 7Yeah, get over it. He had a hemorrhoid ectomy.
Speaker 11Oh, those hurt Good on you. Thank you for your service, thank you.
Speaker 6Thank you for your service. And he was worried that he busted a stitch.
Speaker 11Oh, limo and stitch For real. Yeah, for real.
Speaker 6So he laid on his back. So he laid on his back. Oh poor. Thing.
Speaker 10He's like ah, Baby, yawn style Bro you baby yawned her and I just kind of rolled and rocked.
Speaker 6It was like hee, hee, hee, oh, my God. Trying not to think about it.
Speaker 11No, it was too bad. Were you guys cleared, cleared, were you good. I think it was fun. It was just super painful.
Speaker 3Oh, take you to take a shit after. Oh, my god, god, I bet that's so scary.
Speaker 6Oh, that's so terrible and I was. I was taking like stool soft. That's the worst, like when you have a baby holding. Holding, yeah, it's so bad and it's like you're like I'm dilated.
Speaker 8It's a boy, it's a girl it's a boy it.
Speaker 3I'm reaching. Yeah, it was bad. And then I would go it's a redhead, oh boy Right to the bathtub and soak, oh my God, and like cow gone, take me the fuck away.
Speaker 6It wasn't cow gone, it was all of my lush bad thoughts yes, oh, of course it was Okay. So Okay, sorry, sorry sorry, not the Dr Teal's, I can't read.
Speaker 7I can't read anything on this box except 100%.
Speaker 3Is that so these are called 100% that little thing is so cute.
Speaker 6It's like those little cookie straws do you suck them?
Speaker 1always you were in the Navy.
Speaker 11I'm gonna say yeah when I joined the Navy, I had no lips. Now, look hey, 100% you suck them.
Speaker 3Oh, I did when I joined the.
Speaker 4Navy, I had no lips. Now look 100% you something?
Speaker 3Oh, I did. Taylor said you guys like chips, so we have scallops flavored chips.
Speaker 6Ew, I'll tear those up.
Speaker 3He doesn't eat seafood.
Speaker 6He looks so scared.
Speaker 3Probably from Japan.
Speaker 1This guy is so cute, he's so cute.
Speaker 6I know't eat seafood. He hates seafood, probably from Japan. This guy is so cute. You should give this tattoo. He's so cute, I know.
Speaker 3Then we got a cake break donut cake, ooh, that'll look good.
Speaker 11What's up with you and donuts? Last time when we had our special, we had donuts Dude.
Speaker 7I love it.
Speaker 3Have you seen my belly?
Speaker 7Have you seen the?
Speaker 3size of my person.
Speaker 11Then that explains donuts. I was going to say you have a six-pack, if I remember correctly, party ball.
Speaker 6Okay, oh yeah, I love it, party ball.
Speaker 11See, my memory is just awful.
Speaker 3Ooh, what's that? Grilled seafood flavored Ew why?
Speaker 8are they all fish? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3Ladies.
Speaker 6Because they're fun. It's fun, I'll try it. I'm a little concerned about the 8% that I can't read and the 9% that I can't read.
Speaker 3So we're 8 and 9% of fish oil, scallop oil, I don't know we have bidets in both bathrooms when we lost power.
Military Service and Snack Sampling
Speaker 6So we're on a well. So if we lose electricity, we lose water, and the damn thing I miss the most is my damn bidet, I'll tell you what wiping my ass. No, we had to. Um, we couldn't even access it, like we couldn't hand pump it or nothing, because we have an aerobic septic system. So we had to have our friends bring us five. Well, we had five gallon buckets. We had to help them, have them, help us fill them so we could flush our toilets.
Speaker 6It was a whole ordeal but man, that bidet I missed it, it was camping.
Speaker 3Do you have a generator?
Speaker 6We do have a generator. Well, we have a generator. We have had a generator. We could not get it to run our large appliances, so we could only get it to run.
Speaker 11We had enough to plug in a power strip. So you need a hefty baby? Well, we have a big one, but we didn't have the connections.
Speaker 6What it is is. We didn't have the adapter, so it wanted an adapter with the four prongs for the fridge.
Speaker 3Where do they use it? Chernobyl?
Speaker 6Dude, I don't even know man, we learned.
Speaker 11We learned this time.
Speaker 6But we did have a generator and it was enough to like power, a power strip, so we could, like you know, yeah, entertain our five.
Speaker 3You gotta think about doing is hiring an electrician to put in like and I may not be using the correct term, but you can basically put right next to your fuse box out in the garage or your breaker box, they put in a second one and it's like a transfer switch. So, what would happen is power goes out. There's a little plate that you slide over and you can plug your generator right into your house. And then you can choose on your breaker box if it can't power the entire house.
Speaker 3You can just whatever breaker you want on, choose, reset it.
Speaker 6Oh sorry, we're actually looking into a whole home generator, to be honest, because our neighbor like four doors down has one and we were like we need to do that he had a fortress my dude, so they Because our neighbor, like four doors down has one, and we were like we need to do that.
Speaker 3He had a fortress. My dude. So they'll do something like that. Yeah, now.
Speaker 6But those ones are hooked up to natural gas so we wouldn't even have to. Ours runs on gasoline so we had to, like, trek through an acre of marshland to get to gas.
Speaker 11Because it was wet. It was eight inches of rain.
Speaker 9Eight inches.
Speaker 6We had an amazing amount of rain, oh, it was fantastic.
Speaker 11Wait, so Justin is shipping out dinner.
Speaker 3See you, justin Bye. Yeah, he was at Dad's Bye, signed on as an electrician's mate, but he's going to SWCC Special Warfare Combatant Craft Crewman as soon as I join. I've already signed up. He volunteered. Good on him.
Speaker 6Yeah, so explain what that is.
Speaker 11So that is a volunteer position where you become essentially like a crew chief the person in the aircraft, that when a pilot's flying he doesn't need to go to the back and check out what's going on with the aircraft. He just has a crew chief to check for that for them.
Speaker 3Or like a helicopter, right yeah, helicopter aircraft. They have crew chiefs that are looking at the ground, directing they're also manning the oh yeah the 50 cal.
Speaker 8Whoa.
Speaker 11Yeah, so he, it is a. At the beginning it's really hard because they're trying to make sure to know that you're responsible, Right? So if you do a mistake you get kicked out because of the volunteer position. It's very important, so whenever you go to a school, they're watching you like a hawk. They're trying to make sure. They're trying to weed you out. If you do something wrong, they kick you out, but once you get to your squadron, cake life. That's awesome cake life.
Speaker 3Yeah, justin, we love you too, buddy. Awesome, we're all super proud of you, proud, can't wait to see your success and, uh, please, please let us know graduation day graduation is, and yeah we definitely want to be there.
Speaker 4We definitely want to be there. Super proud of you. That's awesome.
Speaker 5Oh.
Speaker 2That was.
Speaker 3Justin signing off. Oh God. Crackers corn, here we go.
Speaker 5Just grab the smell, spicy it smells spicy it does say hot cheese on it.
Speaker 3Oh does it. It does say hot cheese on it. Asmr, Everybody be quiet?
Speaker 11That's what I tell her.
Speaker 3Just camel cheese. Cameltoe cheese it's like a really bad Cheeto. Oh, the guy at Noble Said he's gonna get Some more crazy snacks.
Speaker 11Oh dude One is like a.
Speaker 3He said a Cheetos, a Cheetos cereal.
Speaker 6Ew With milk. I mean I would eat that.
Speaker 3With milk.
Speaker 6I love Cheetos With milk. I eat my cereal dry.
Speaker 11Yes, she does?
Speaker 6I don't like milk, I am like cereal dry. Yes, she does, I don't like milk, I'm like real gross.
Speaker 11I'm trying to figure it out, aren't we?
Speaker 2all.
Speaker 1This is disgusting. It's like a Cheeto you found under the couch.
Speaker 6That's what it tastes like. Why do you know what that tastes like?
Speaker 11It tastes like grass clippings.
Speaker 6Grass clippings, so cellulose.
Speaker 11All right.
Speaker 2I'll try.
Speaker 6We're doing scallops.
Speaker 11I'm not a fan. Not a fan. Scallops I'm not a fan.
Speaker 3I love scallops.
Speaker 6I hope those are good Let me smell. It looks like it, it doesn't smell like it, it does.
Speaker 11It smells like potato chipsasco.
Speaker 6It smells like pine salt the chip.
Speaker 11What's going on there?
Speaker 6This is not great.
Speaker 3What's going on there, Shane? I'm a quarter Native American. That's why this cracker's corn tastes bad.
Speaker 6Because you're not a cracker and that tastes awful.
Speaker 3Shit.
Speaker 6You ruined my joke, she's eating the clam.
Speaker 1No, you did a cracker and that tastes awful Shit. Yeah, you ruined my joke. She's eating the clam. No, you did Wait what? The clam? The?
Speaker 11clam. What is it the clam?
Speaker 8She ate it.
Speaker 11Clam, clam, clam jam the clap.
Speaker 9She likes it.
Speaker 6Scallop.
Speaker 10Ooh, that was nice.
Speaker 8That's a good. They taste like a nice soft barbecue oh, soft barbecue.
Speaker 6Barbecue, that sounds burby gentle barbecue either. Good, I need to get that nasty I like that yeah, I'm with you on that one it's like a diet barbecue, is it diet? It's just like a jet, like it's, you know, barbecue late is it?
Speaker 11is it like diet soda, baby? No, it's good.
Speaker 6You know it's soda, but it's diet they're not bad at all and they don't taste anything like scallops. To be honest, let me try that shit. Try that shit. Not bad, I would eat that, no sure, okay, I got a little something, but it's not maybe yeah maybe deep sea-ish over here, but very mild, that's good. I like that. We all are eating it. After the, I have a clean palate.
Speaker 1I don't like it.
Speaker 6Oh.
Speaker 3Oh, oh, uh-oh Tastes like mercury, I should have had a barf bag for everyone.
Speaker 4Not the mercury. That would be tuna. I don't like that. I don't get it.
Speaker 6Well, I'm back to me.
Speaker 11I don't get it.
Speaker 6The flavor.
Speaker 11Yeah, the flavor, I don't get it Like. At first I got like a kick. I like scallops, but and then I didn't get a kick.
Speaker 6Let's see the real seafood. And then it tastes like potato chips Ew, it's like cat food. It's like a Ladies, it doesn't. It's like a soft barbecue. That is such an exact Japanese Lays, sponsor me. I like you.
Speaker 3Hey, did you say Sawyer was playing basketball again? Because I got a video of him last year playing basketball. I want to show everybody.
Speaker 10Yes, I love this.
Speaker 3Here he is, there, he is right here, here he goes, yes.
Speaker 8Here's Saw, saw You'll get it, he was to dunk.
Speaker 3You'll get it.
Speaker 7He was so close.
Speaker 3You'll get it one day buddy, you'll get it one day he does not have brown hair.
Speaker 1He's a baby. Sasa the angel.
Speaker 2No, I love watching him play.
Speaker 6Why are you opening them like that? I can't open them. Can someone help me? Help me? I was wondering what was happening.
Speaker 4It's child proof.
Speaker 6It's real thick, I can't get it. No, I'm kidding, for whatever material this is. It is kind of like aluminum.
Speaker 11Oh my God, Aluminium, can you hold my beer?
Speaker 6It's Republican proof I need to get it, it is.
Speaker 10Yo, this is like.
Speaker 1Just squeeze it like this this is like yeah, like all.
Speaker 6Not the teeth. They're so beautiful. You're the only one in the family that has good teeth, uh-oh.
Speaker 4Uh-oh.
Speaker 7Strip club.
Speaker 3Smells like a strip club.
Speaker 1It smells like two o'clock on a Tuesday afternoon at Waffle House.
Speaker 3Oh my gosh, she's making a wink.
Speaker 1Emma's in a hole of sweet kids' eyes. Emma's in a hole of sweet kids' eyes.
Speaker 3I don't get it, her whispering eyes, whispering eyes.
Speaker 6Oh, whispering eyes. That's it is, that's pussy.
Speaker 10Does this smell?
Speaker 6like patoosie. It smells like bad fish. It smells like you, let's do it. I do not partake Dirty pussy, in that I'm not into women, so I would notake dirty in that I'm not into women, so I would not.
Speaker 11I'm able to tolerate it that smells like bad fish.
Speaker 6It's when you put the fish food in the thing. Oh no, yeah it stinks like bad fish what?
Speaker 8that's?
Speaker 6my fucking coochie that's hanging out you're gonna eat it yeah you're gonna eat it yeah oh, you gotta smell it.
Speaker 11You gotta smell it, smell it that's why he's so opposed to it.
Speaker 6Oh god, no, that smells like a really bad women's locker room.
Speaker 4It's really nasty man.
Speaker 6Oh, my God oh.
Speaker 1Oh, that smells like bad cannabis.
Speaker 11I had my nose in there and I held it for a while. Is that what BB smells like?
Speaker 6Probably Dude, I can't do it See if your dog likes it, he don't puke for nothing. So he'll try it, See if your dog likes it, give it to Ruby Ruby.
Speaker 8Don't forfeit her Ruby. I'll try one, but I ain't sniffing it.
Speaker 3She's got a big beaver, you okay.
Speaker 8I just got a peeve. Want to know how to take a shit in a coffee cup.
Speaker 3Yeah, more than those chips.
Speaker 1I regret.
Speaker 3My beard, I would do a whole lot.
Speaker 2I regret this right now instead of sniffing those chips.
Speaker 3Did someone try?
Speaker 6it, yet I did I regret it.
Speaker 3It's like a hot vagina it's spicy, let's do this donut thing. Let me try that with a cake donut thing.
Speaker 1No man, it's hot tuna. It's like hot tuna.
Speaker 11Oh, it has a kick, it does.
Speaker 9Tuna kick.
Speaker 3Okay.
Speaker 1Now I can't.
Speaker 11It's like, it tastes like sriracha, that's not too bad it does, but like fishy too, that's not too bad it does, but like fishy too, that's a good palate cleanser.
Speaker 6That's good. We're going to do it in the. Let me give you some.
Speaker 3It's not bad. It tastes like cake. Where is?
Speaker 1this from it tastes like cake.
Speaker 3I don't know about that one.
Speaker 1Well, you probably should know. Cake break. This is from Malaysia.
Speaker 11Diva. Oh, isn't that the flight that got lost?
Speaker 6Yes, open up that thing. Well, we found this one.
Speaker 3And that's actually an in-flight snack From Malaysia, flight number 552. 571. There you go.
Speaker 6I almost said 471. This is good. It's good.
Speaker 11It's good. Why do you have so many holes in your jeans?
Speaker 3Nah bro, is the chocolate bad?
Speaker 6bad it's just cheapy or something. Owls are active at night. The little sticks have animal facts.
Speaker 3Wait, wait, wait, wait. That is cute. Wait, they're called Yan Yan and you can't read anything else on that package but, that says.
Speaker 6No this is in English oh, okay, oh okay.
Speaker 1Yan Yan.
Speaker 6Yan Yan. It's been translated Ruby Ruby. That is extremely cute.
Speaker 3Is it because they're using only no?
Speaker 1preservatives. Oh, maybe Is that Nutella.
Speaker 3And we're just used to America's poison food.
Speaker 2It does not taste like beautiful precious Nutella, or if Kate's going to change it.
Speaker 6Squid Black ink Squid. This is cute. This would be a cute kid's thing. You want to try that chocolate? Because I don't want to do that, I'll try it. I'll eat one of the cookies. I'll try it.
Speaker 3Darwin Let Yep.
Speaker 11Cow Moo Moo. What's a? U, but it's M-U-U-U-U-U Moo.
Speaker 6It's a Malaysian cow, it's a Malaysian cat, it's a Malaysian cow.
Thanksgiving Banter and Comedy Show
Speaker 11Oh, get the fuck out of here. Look how far it could go. You would think you could go all the way down. You can't.
Speaker 8Oh what oh. They cheaped out, can't. Oh what oh?
Speaker 11they cheaped out. They cheaped out, bro. Wow, cheater the.
Speaker 1Malaysian cow says moo Moo.
Speaker 11Uh-oh.
Speaker 3Not bad Not bad. Alright.
Speaker 4Pass that around.
Speaker 6Not bad.
Speaker 5Did I miss anything, yeah?
Speaker 11All the little sticks have little animals and some the vagina chips are spicy.
Speaker 1Yeah, that too Bat only in the night.
Speaker 11Spicy vagina. That's why it smells like that. It is bb is it nutella?
Speaker 6no it's like chocolate I dig it I love it do you know those like panda or little koala cookies that are hollow but they're filled with chocolate? No, you know what?
Speaker 1I'm talking about.
Speaker 5Is it like that kind of chocolate Panda?
Speaker 6Maybe, I don't know Similar. Do you have a Michelob?
Speaker 11Do you have a Michelob on your?
Speaker 6table?
Speaker 1We don't have a Michelob.
Speaker 3We got. Topo Chico's, I think.
Speaker 2We have Topo Chico's and we have Dos Equis, lime and salt.
Speaker 11Dos Equis, por favor, dos Equis, he don't like salt.
Speaker 6You're not an advocate, he could be.
Speaker 1I got a PGA. Be right back.
Speaker 11Depends on who's asking, don't miss me.
Speaker 1How do I get out of here?
Speaker 11Get out, go through the wall Out. Hey Shane, honestly. Thank you for your service, thank you, thank you, thank you, and I'm glad it's Friday and she went into the Air Force.
Speaker 3Thank you for your service yes, thank you for your service. Thank you.
Speaker 6I always forget about you my, it's okay, dad wouldn't let me is uh my parents told me to get the fuck out yeah, I was there.
Speaker 11I was like oh, eso es malo.
Speaker 6This is so bad, but I want this little brown boy.
Speaker 3All I know is TGIF, oh yeah.
Speaker 11Oh, that's my dance right there. Yes, oh yeah, those are good hips right there.
Speaker 4Oh, whoa, oh, what Ew.
Speaker 11She knows how to party. No, ma'am, mm-hmm, whose slutty Grammy is that?
Speaker 4Someone get your meme off.
Speaker 11Someone's Grammy is slutty.
Speaker 3I think we just saw future taylor lee. I have to show that when she comes back oh hey, the trump dance little arms.
Speaker 11What so simple yeah so simple.
Speaker 2Oh my god you need to tell david that his white man dance is almost a Trump dance.
Speaker 3Or it is. Maybe that's what he does.
Speaker 5Conspiracy, salud. Is it good? What else we got?
Speaker 3Oh, what's up? Well, she's back now. Taylor Lee, I got a chicken video.
Speaker 8Oh yeah, taylor.
Speaker 3Yeah, we just found future you.
Speaker 11Future Taylor Right now.
Speaker 3Oh, here Sliding into Friday life, I dig it, oh, oh.
Speaker 8She might come all over her.
Speaker 6Oh no. What's that movie when he puts it in his hair? What about Mary?
Speaker 11Grammy got the itch.
Speaker 1I hope I don't.
Speaker 3But I have a video that I've titled. Chicken Guy for the chicken owners. I don't remember what it is. Hey, I'm at.
Speaker 10Chicken Guy and I'm at Guy Fieri's place, Fieri Fieri. You know it depends on how you spell it and how you say it. But swear to God, two chicken sandwiches, two waters, $75. What Fuck this? Guy oh fuck this guy I didn't hear anything. They're a dollar a piece. Fuck you Guy. Fuck you Guy.
Speaker 11So he said two sandwiches for $75.
Speaker 10These places are closing left and right. This guy's a complete piece of shit, Go fuck yourself.
Speaker 5He said go fuck this guy.
Speaker 10I love it. He is mad.
Speaker 11He's mad $75?
Speaker 6I've never heard anybody talk bad about him. Well damn if he charges $75 for two sandwiches.
Speaker 1That is very good, but my thing, is you had the menu you could have just said I don't want to spend that much, I'm out. Maybe it didn't have the prices on it. I doubt it when I heard the bill, I would have said peace.
Speaker 5Yeah.
Speaker 10A chicken sandwich.
Speaker 6Does it come with?
Speaker 11a full body massage and you drive me home after A happy ending.
Speaker 6Do I get a happy ending? Because damn yes, please Does it come with yes, please.
Speaker 1Zaddy. Oh no, oh, dan Taylor, dan Taylor.
Speaker 4So, after Veterans Day oh, so are you, are you?
Speaker 3going to suck it, whoa Suck it. A next good holiday is.
Speaker 7Thanksgiving.
Speaker 3Well depends on better than Turkey.
Speaker 1Day.
Speaker 4But I'm just saying we gotta remember this. What is this?
Speaker 3About Thanksgiving.
Speaker 11Baby come and stuff my turkey Baby, come and stuff my turkey.
Speaker 9I'm aching for a side of beef. There's a sale at the fish market that angle is just so unflattering without the meat man. I want to put that pig in a blanket wow and I'm warming up the apple pie. If you want to get a little fruity, I'll feed you grapes right off the vine. Sexy thanksgiving is the best time of year. Wash it down with some tang and a beer, nibble on my juicy thighs and don't forget to drop a nut in the pie.
Speaker 9Bro, Thanksgiving is good. I want a banana split. You can eat a peach for hours tonight. I'll suck the corn right off the cob. You'll get a watermelon sugar high. My ham needs a good glazing. Macaroni needs a stirrin' in the pot.
Speaker 8Okay.
Speaker 9I got an all-you-can-eat kind of spread.
Speaker 5Oh.
Speaker 9And I think you're gonna like it a lot. Thanksgiving is the best time of year. Oh no, you, you're gonna like it a lot. Thanksgiving is the best time of year. Oh no, you dropped one. Watch it down with some ginger yeah, they good. Nibble all my juicy dogs.
Speaker 12And don't forget to drop a nut in the pile Thanksgiving is good.
Speaker 9I am thankful every day for the way your sausage tastes. I could sit and count my blessings or sip my roast beef on your face.
Speaker 8Damn Geraldine.
Speaker 11She's speaking my language. Public speaker 101 right there, amen.
Speaker 6I need Geraldine and Teeth Guy. These are good, these are Guy to hook up. These are good these are good Oreos. They're like Oreo and milk.
Speaker 3These are good, mixed down whoa, whoa, whoa.
Speaker 1Which ones wherever those are from, they're good 100% oh, 100% or 100% they're pretty good, they're good man did you guys like
Speaker 4it. Oh no, it's hollow. It's got honey milk, I think, or something. That cute little character, what's that.
Speaker 1Vanilla, vanilla.
Speaker 11That's supposed to be a straw Hang on.
Speaker 1Ew Is that beer?
Speaker 11Hey, don't judge me.
Speaker 6Oh, I'm judging. We both did. Why don't you fuck up your beer?
Speaker 11Bro, you could.
Speaker 7Yeah, bro.
Speaker 6Have you had one of those Oreo Coke Zeros Ew?
Speaker 8What? What do I look like?
Speaker 1It is so confusing because it's not bad, but it's not good.
Speaker 11Like a diet soda.
Speaker 7I mean you do have a choker on.
Speaker 2This is Molly's choker.
Speaker 4Did you?
Speaker 3put it on just for the pot.
Speaker 4Yeah.
Speaker 6Squeeze me, yeah, because you're going to see her friend boy later Styling Friend boy. Lincoln asked me earlier. I said Mama Taylor's going to come over. You know we're going to do a podcast and then she's going to come up with the fence. And he's like. I said oh, and her friend. He said who, who? I said Jay.
Speaker 1No, we don't say his name. God damn it.
Speaker 6Quellen Quellen, Jaqueline. And his immediate question was like what's his middle name? I said I have no idea, Jake from State Farm. But that's all you want to know about Jake from State Farm. What's his middle name?
Speaker 1What's his middle name?
Speaker 6Maybe not my birthday.
Speaker 11My birthday.
Speaker 6You know, his perception of time is like years.
Speaker 7So hey, liberals, oh, and Democrats, what you think now?
Speaker 8buddy oh. God Trump won all the sweet states what it was a landslide victory.
Speaker 9Why are you so? What happened? So all my the gravitational pull.
Speaker 8Voters of other races that voted for Trump.
Speaker 2God bless you, baby. Are you a? We did it. God bless you, baby. Are you a mother? We did it. We're taking America back.
Speaker 11I don't Thank you for your service.
Speaker 3Thank you for your service. I don't know what he's taking back. He should take back his teeth, his weight.
Speaker 11His penis. We did it, america. Come on, keep going, keep going. Come on His penis, come on, keep going.
Speaker 7Keep going. Come on His penis. What's next His gout.
Speaker 6His gout, yes, his cholesterol. His cholesterol His blood pressure, his blood pressure Clean underwear Clean underwear. Yeah, his folds.
Speaker 11His folds. I think we know what his folds smell like. Where's that at?
Speaker 7Hot tuna.
Speaker 11Smell that smell that the grilled patoosey seafood flavor.
Speaker 3Smell that. You're smelling his fupa sexy, sexy, it's gross.
Speaker 11Do you want to smell my folds?
Speaker 6do you want to clean my folds?
Speaker 3I think right now. I think right now we're going to take a little intermission. It's going to be very quick Five to seven minutes.
Speaker 11Only takes me that she needs to poop. No, I don't need to poop, we're just going to take an intermission, I do have to pee.
Speaker 3We'll get reset and we'll be back here in just a second.
Speaker 11I love your song.
Speaker 9Thank you, we'll be back here in just a second.
Speaker 2I love your song.
Speaker 3We're back, Live baby. Let's get this going.
Speaker 1He doesn't recognize her dad.
News Desk Comedy Segment
Speaker 3Good evening. My name is Biff McMasterson and you are watching the LUW.78. Which is fart on your telephone dial. Let's go. Let's go to our reporters in the field for some news stories, jeff what do you have going on for us?
Speaker 7They're still inside searching for evidence. I'm told six people have been arrested and charged with intent to possess and deliver cocaine. I'm told as much as 44 times.
Speaker 3Well, hey, Jeff.
Speaker 8They're making it laws where you can't drink when you want to.
Speaker 2You have to wear a seatbelt when you're driving.
Speaker 5Pretty soon we're going to become this country. Any attempt to restrict drinking and driving here is viewed by some as downright undemocratic.
Speaker 6It's kind of getting common.
Speaker 2When a fella can't put in a hard day's work, put in 11, 12 hours a day and then get in your truck and at least rain one or two beers. Son of a bitch.
Speaker 6Things a man gets, things that excite you.
Speaker 3Commercial break time.
Speaker 9A starched shirt, things that are stiff.
Speaker 3Won $10,000. Won ten thousand dollars I'm done, I'm early welcome.
Speaker 8Welcome to bill shire, good morning.
Speaker 2Good morning, carol airlines I don't think this heat is very welcome at this time of the year. No, but it's been nice not to have those uh, thunder showers in the afternoon. That's true.
Speaker 1The heat is making me as wet as the thundershowers.
Speaker 3Sharon what do you mean by that?
Speaker 2Chances are. Take a shot of this. I want you to get a shot of this. Are you communist? No, we're all Americans. Man, you're an American, I'm an American. This is Ike Pappas at Socolow Park attempting to do a close. Do you see what we have to go through? Thank you very much. Would you mind? I've got 15 minutes before air. Okay, come on really.
Speaker 3Look, fellas, will you please leave us alone. The news is hard, so am I. I've been Biff McMasterson and this has been L-U-W-F News Desk. That's it. That's a new segment. It was me all along segment. It was me all along. It was me all along, guys, I'm sorry guys, huh, put it on your your hair.
Speaker 6Yeah, I thought you're gonna put up.
Speaker 11Oh, you want to wear the way? Heck, yeah, let me see, I've never had one.
Speaker 3You never had what Hair.
Speaker 7You got hair.
Speaker 11You gotta figure that out dude.
Speaker 3There you go, there you go. If I could do a Trump impression, that's who I would have just tried to do, but I can't you want the dog.
Speaker 10This room is excellent Overall, excellent and beautiful.
Speaker 3Beautiful people. You're gay.
Speaker 6Some people say it's the best. I don't know, that's what people say.
Speaker 11Trust me, I'm the best one ever.
Speaker 7Oh boy.
Speaker 3Y'all ready for some funny TikToks? Y'all really ready for toilet talks? I have some great videos. Me, mine. That's the Brinley wig. That's what I wore when I filmed that documentary. Brindley Yep, that's maybe a famous wig one day.
Speaker 11It's better than that.
Speaker 3Really Wow, wow.
Speaker 11Does that smell like Asian patoosie?
Speaker 6Is it custom fitted to your head? No, you look like the chick from 15 kids and counting kids are just falling out or like can I speak to your manager?
Speaker 11my name is Karen now please have an appetizer and your manager hey listen, you need more biscuits out here on the buffet. My name is Karen.
Speaker 3Now please have an appetizer and your manager hey, listen, you need more biscuits out here on the buffet. You're out of biscuits. You see a family of five walk in. You get the biscuits going. That was mom at Kentucky Fried Chicken.
Speaker 8I'm walking you, I'm walking you.
Speaker 3All right.
Speaker 8Tresha I'm walking you.
Speaker 3All right, tresha, let's do it.
Speaker 12Let's go full throttle.
Speaker 9I just super daddied my pants.
Speaker 3I smell, shit Did you see it, here we go.
Speaker 11Oh, right out the corner of the fun hotel, boney, the double-sup, triple-sup, oh my God.
Speaker 9Paul oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh oh oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
Speaker 7Down the stairs Sounds like Badog Ba-ba, ho-ho-ho-ho.
Speaker 4Something's in my ass that was loud, sir.
Speaker 3I think it's only that one.
Speaker 12I'm going to space today and I'm going to the smaller rocket, buzz Lightyear, to the rescue.
Speaker 3Buzz Light Rear.
Speaker 1To all the mechanics out there. Can you please tell me why my car is making this noise?
Speaker 3You got to check your O2 sensor.
Speaker 9Was that like a female quagmire.
Speaker 3In case y'all need a reason to get a porch camera and wear a helmet at all times, ouch.
Speaker 9I am straight.
Speaker 8I'm not gay.
Speaker 7I'm not gay. God, you're gay, I'm straight and I You're gay, I'm straight and I like women and women. Only. There's nothing wrong with being gay, but I'm not.
Speaker 5I'm not.
Speaker 7Is he a Navi from Avatar?
Speaker 4What.
Speaker 3Dude, you're gay, you have no eyebrows, and why are you sweating so bad Okay.
Speaker 11Cocaine is a hell of a drug. Oh no, oh no.
Speaker 3Oh my god, is that what y'all did At your little elephant overnighter? Yeah, that's what they did all night. Friend boy took a dong to the face. Wow, and it wasn't yours, it wasn't. Yeah, that happened.
Speaker 11Oh, is this the guy who like slaps? Oh no, this is look at the guy.
Speaker 3Watch the guy smile. He's like what is this fool doing?
Speaker 4no one part gets really full doing.
Speaker 3No one part gets really disturbing for me here in just a second. No, no, no, I would get up and I would scissor kick you in your fucking gizzard. Whoa, they stay at home. Got a little tent, a little pup tent.
Speaker 4And done.
Speaker 7Boink, boink, boink, boink.
Speaker 3Ow Ow, I should have clipped this Worth that. Oh my god, it's Jason Bourne.
Speaker 6Yes, I don't know. Is that money? What Is he? A Nazi?
Speaker 4Casey I don't know there is something so healing about this he had Chuck E Cheese tokens.
Speaker 7By the leaves and the trees and just taking a moment, I am healed.
Speaker 3He took an epic bong. Rip Mom, I can do a double backflip. No, you can't. I kind of find it funny when kids get hurt.
Speaker 6Do not hurt yourself. No, do not hurt yourself?
Speaker 8What are you doing? Picking up?
Speaker 4dog shit. What kind of video games does Lincoln say dad plays?
Speaker 6Lincoln says dad plays Kill Motherfuckers. Oh no, daddy, she's playing Kill Motherfuckers again. I said okay, don't say that only in the house what does that say?
Speaker 11coming what?
Speaker 9coming, my asshole, you're sick. Thank you, mm-hmm.
Speaker 3Is that better? I think everyone has been.
Speaker 11You've been talking to yourself, good sir.
Speaker 3It still picked it up, I think.
Speaker 11Oh no.
Speaker 1This is going to go badly, oh, I think. Oh.
Speaker 3No, this is going to go badly, no, no.
Speaker 6Yes.
Speaker 11Oh, why, though? And that's why women live longer why is that?
Speaker 6part of your body. Why?
Speaker 3Why did it sound so loud? What did he just set off A sound, and, yeah, that didn't feel good. I don't think.
Speaker 1Not with that face. Pop his cherry too, will it?
Speaker 6Is it like a rite of passage or something? What do?
Speaker 11they think I missed that one.
Speaker 7So I'm going to get you to say the alphabet backwards, from Z to A. Whoa.
Speaker 11He's stuck in the simulation.
Speaker 7Well, me neither. Can you just put the lightsaber away for us first the lightsaber.
Speaker 9Oh, it's retractable, Is it? Oh, oh.
Speaker 8Oh, god oh.
Speaker 3God, yes, it's going to go in your butt.
Speaker 5I got it, I'll get it.
Speaker 3I got it. Shit I got. I'll get it. I got Shit.
Speaker 7I got it, damn it, I got it.
Speaker 1Can you say the alphabet backwards?
Speaker 7Hell no.
Speaker 1I can't X.
Speaker 11Z X, damn, you failed, you drunk, you drunk girl.
Speaker 8I am not, I'm sober.
Speaker 4I got Z Y X. That is such a dumb question.
Speaker 3I feel like they're just trying to get you. I don't know what I would say if they really thought I was drunk which I don't drink and drive but if they thought, I don't either and they said can you say the alphabet backwards? I think I would have to go you do it first.
Speaker 4Let me see how you can do it.
Speaker 3Spell it Spell it backwards. But he said can you say the alphabet backwards from?
Speaker 4Z to.
Speaker 3A, that's what the cop said.
Speaker 1Some people say Z for Z who. Some people In Florida Socialists. Yeah is that in Florida?
Speaker 11Thank you for your service.
Speaker 8Damn, I've never heard of them.
Speaker 11Oh yeah, she shit herself.
Speaker 4Spiritual.
Speaker 1Oh my god.
Speaker 3The correction oh.
Speaker 6I'm so afraid of that.
Speaker 11Yeah, one in the chamber, one in the chamber and fourth, place the squirrel oh.
Speaker 4He said shit.
Speaker 3Oh my god, the bench clench.
Speaker 5Oh no, that forehead though.
Speaker 3Get it, dude. That's a big one. Get it, dude, you do it. One time he could shoot his face, oh god.
Speaker 11That's a lot of torque, is that his dick Right?
Speaker 5over his face.
Speaker 11Yeah, see, that's my nightmare. Somebody just teabagged me.
Speaker 6They're squealing like girls. And you know when people laugh, they go like weak.
Speaker 11Oh no.
Speaker 6It's winking action Whisperin'.
Speaker 3I's winking, actually Spring is winking, oh good morning lady. Chicken dance.
Speaker 11And done. Why does it look like that?
Speaker 7Why is it winking? You just watched the entire video.
Speaker 5The entire. Thing.
Political Analyst Debates Election Results
Speaker 7What did you expect to happen? I don't know what happened is exactly. Did you expect to happen? I don't know. What happened is exactly what you expected to happen and you watched the entire video.
Speaker 11You're right, taylor, you're sick. What your family's worried?
Speaker 8about you Stop watching weird shit on the internet. But I can't, yeah, taylor.
Speaker 6Is that Geraldine's brother internet? But I can, yeah Taylor, help. It Is that Geraldine's brother.
Speaker 11Yo, oh my God, metal. That's Molly on the playground. That's Molly right there.
Speaker 8Molly, god damn, son of a bitch. That's me Fucking thing.
Speaker 10God damn it. Fuck. That's me on my office.
Speaker 11That's me on my office get the fuck out.
Speaker 3I'm on meetings at work and I have to double triple check my mute button on my mic.
Speaker 9I do if I'm cussing and I'm like you, dumb motherfucker, I don't really do that if you're having a bad day, just remember there's somebody out there pulling a door that says push.
Speaker 5Oh, that's me.
Speaker 8Taylor.
Speaker 5That's me.
Speaker 6You're doing great. That's me too. Oh, oh, sexy, sexy, oh, the patoosie.
Speaker 11Right in the clam.
Speaker 8Ow, not the patoosie ow not the patoosie how sweet that was trick boy, wait a minute, replay that hang on one second.
Speaker 3What? Hold on one second hold on, just to make sure first, hotel room together.
Speaker 11I'm leaving pregnant. What Hold on? Hold on One second. Hold on, just to make sure. First hotel room together. I'm leaving, right, right.
Speaker 4Okay, yo.
Speaker 3It's what I thought.
Speaker 11I saw. Well, in this time of age you can't assume Fuck around.
Speaker 12Fuck around, fuck around, fuck around, fuck around.
Speaker 11Fuck around.
Speaker 8Yo, that's Molly Doo.
Speaker 2It's called the Dank Tank. It's a mobile hotbox. You can see it's got an AC unit on it and it's a trailer. So what they'll do is pull it up to a party or wherever you want to be where you can't smoke inside and you'll hotbox in the Dank Tank. So it's like a mobile rental hotbox.
Speaker 3That's fucking brilliant.
Speaker 10With the blow-up nightclub.
Speaker 9They have blow-up nightclubs, yeah.
Speaker 8And they're so cool, and a dank tank.
Speaker 3We're getting a dank tank.
Speaker 8For my 50th birthday. Oh yeah, When's?
Speaker 6that, oh, hell yeah.
Speaker 8Five minutes In five minutes, two weeks. You're every 50 in two weeks.
Speaker 4No oh.
Speaker 6He'll be 48.
Speaker 148.
Speaker 6Oh Well, we got to wait two years. Fuck that, he's going to be a big boy.
Speaker 11Is that too long?
Speaker 8There'll be no world then, yikes.
Speaker 11Come on.
Speaker 4Oh.
Speaker 11Vianna it's a little girl, girl, vianna Vianna confidence oh no, oh, mr Fulton, yo look at that chin, oh shit okay, I didn't see that coming something tells me you did.
Speaker 6That's not the first time that's the kind of selfie Shane sent me the day of our first date.
Speaker 11You did Sexy, it was pretty bad.
Speaker 6Sexy, I didn't.
Speaker 3Did you get all ready and then you were like when I open my camera on my phone, and it's always forward facing. I'm down here and I'm like and then all the photos or the videos I post on TikTok. I'll start the video here and I'm like oh fuck.
Speaker 6No, so I immediately took that picture to my friend Emily and said please tell me that this is just a bad picture.
Speaker 2You said, I did not go on this date.
Speaker 6Because all the other pictures I have of him are not this and I have not met this man in person.
Speaker 2Do you remember? It was like y'all's third date or something that we were all there.
Speaker 10Yeah.
Speaker 6We were Dave and Buster's. Yeah, it was oh, yeah, yeah because I thought Melinda was one of your sisters.
Speaker 11That's right. Yeah, one of the sisters. I thought, I was one of the sisters Hello. What's your name?
Speaker 7Oh, how pretty of you.
Speaker 9We were like we like her.
Speaker 1My mom didn't like it when we said fart.
Speaker 7And my dad Called them panty burps. So a little bit different Parenting styles from the two of them.
Speaker 6That's why that person Looks like that.
Speaker 7Explain why.
Speaker 11Panty, burps.
Speaker 7Growing up my mom didn't like it when we said fart and my dad called them panty burps. So a little bit different parenting styles from the two of them.
Speaker 11That's very disturbing.
Speaker 8So uh. I guess my girl forgot that I had cameras in the house. Uh-oh, and what I seen her do today broke my heart.
Speaker 2Why are you punching, are you?
Speaker 11farting Nice.
Speaker 3Nice Because she went, mmm.
Speaker 1Every girl does that. Really everybody does it everybody listen, listen.
Speaker 11I don't get no cooter shots.
Speaker 6Leave my hair alone to keep the hair, talking about farts or cooter shots.
Speaker 11Either way, I don't get none.
Speaker 6Oh, whatever, whatever, you're full of crap. We wouldn't be married if you weren't getting nothing. Yeah, you don't get no tooter cooter.
Speaker 11The penny burps. Oh, is it getting the penny burps?
Speaker 4I can't take this anymore.
Speaker 1What's tooter? Cooter and penny burps. That's what you look like Cam with the glasses on.
Speaker 7So, if anybody, If anybody, my name is.
Speaker 11Yolanda.
Speaker 3If anybody really wants to know why Trump.
Speaker 11Yolanda.
Speaker 3Why Trump won in a landslide. Okay, okay, it's because of this lady. What did she say?
Speaker 11handle it okay.
Speaker 1So we're closing in on almost 5 pm eastern time. Everything that's been going on across the country today, and my most important encounter was when I went out to get my champagne. I was talking to the guy in the store, of course, asking him did he vote? And he said he did early voting. And he asked me if I early voted. And he asked me you know why I was getting the champagne? And I said because I'm going to be toasting, madam President, tonight.
Speaker 1And he just looked at me with kind of like a smirk on his face and I said you know she's going to win this right. And he says oh well, it's very, very close. And I said no, it's not. He says well, what do you mean? I said no, it's not. The women of America are making their voices heard. Reproductive rights is what it all comes down to, and the women are voting in numbers relative to men that are unbelievable. She's won this and I said to him she's going to take every one of the swing states plus Iowa. And he said oh, but the numbers are so close. I said I'm a political analyst. I'm telling you right now the numbers.
Speaker 1Sounds like she's talking a lot. Political analyst and I said to him you realize, and he didn't tell me who he voted for, but of course I knew and I said you do realize you wasted your vote, right, she likes, and I didn't care, I walked out with my mom.
Speaker 11She needs some moisture on her neck.
Speaker 1She happily walked home.
Speaker 11Her face is like, very like.
Speaker 3And I bet you were crying later on. That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 11So I didn't hear that. So what happened? That was a minute and 35 second video.
Speaker 3So this lady was very pretentious and huge Kamala supporter, whatever Good on her. And then she's like well, you know, I'm watching the election and Kamala is just running away with it. And so I went ahead and went to the store and I'm checking out with my champagne, you mean?
Speaker 11the champagne.
Speaker 3And the clerk was like, oh, what are you celebrating? And she's like, oh, I'm going to be making a toast to Madam President.
Speaker 5Madam and he was like oh oh okay, is it?
Speaker 3how close, is it or something? And he was like well, trump's winning no you said, the numbers are super close. Yeah, they're super close and she goes no, no, they're not.
Speaker 8They're not. And what are you talking about?
Speaker 3I'm a political analyst. Analyst. I'm a political analyst, so you wasted your vote bud you look like to not to not, it's not a face, mom it's not a face, mom.
Speaker 4This is who I am you should get the glasses, the sunglasses you look like an.
Speaker 1American dad when Roger dresses.
Speaker 6When Roger wears the wigs Stan.
Speaker 7Stan.
Speaker 11Listen, I have a great idea, oh baby farts, baby farts, I love baby farts.
Speaker 8Here we go. I'll sound them out so you can hear it.
Speaker 4Okay, please.
Speaker 7Oh wow, can I just say change his diaper.
Speaker 3It's a long one. He can't hear you doing that. I'm doing it for him. I can have a long one.
Speaker 8He can't hear you doing that. I'm doing it for him. I can have a weird face.
Speaker 6Oh, it's like a motorcycle. Yeah, thanks.
Speaker 3Oh, a little.
Speaker 11Oh, oh yeah.
Speaker 3That's a happy face. I get that face. You know that feels good. Oh, yeah, I get that face.
Speaker 12You know that feels, good.
Speaker 11Oh yeah, the pressure Is that popcorn Nope COVID.
Speaker 3COVID, that's how it started.
Speaker 1Jess, oh wow. Hey, you want to tell your mama if you're sick.
Speaker 11Oh wow, hey, you want to tell your mama if you're sick, oh whoa.
Speaker 3Oh, look at this evil. Look, that's how Mel looks when she farts.
Speaker 10Oh my.
Speaker 4God Okay he's laughing.
Speaker 10Okay, we're good.
Speaker 3All right Interesting, that's all your farts.
Speaker 1That's all your farts, that's all the farts.
Speaker 11I love them and thank you for interpreting.
Speaker 1You're welcome. Interpreted fart dance. People did not choose grocery.
Speaker 11I was looking at Casey's face the whole entire time.
Speaker 9You were doing it too.
Speaker 3Oh, taylor, you said you were going to be. You know you're kind of scared after the election results. Oh yeah, see, if this helps, I don't know.
Speaker 12People did not choose grocery prices over your human rights. People chose grocery prices over your delusions that your rights were being taken away in the first place. Nobody is taking away your rights. Trump was already president and he didn't take away gay marriage. He didn't enact a national abortion ban. So stop scolding working class people because they didn't prioritize your delusions over their ability to put food on the table. The people who talk so much about privilege don't seem to understand what a privileged position it is to be in to be able to prioritize your own delusions that your rights are being taken away, to be able to prioritize that over your ability to put food on the table. I see so many people doing anything but reflecting on why the Democrat Party's message was such a resounding failure with the American people this election cycle. This was a sweeping red wave because people are tired of prioritizing fake issues. People are tired of coddling adults who demand that everybody prioritize their feelings over everyone else's ability to feed themselves.
Speaker 11It looked very energetic.
Speaker 7I think he's really hungry.
Speaker 1I get it. His voice is so nice yeah, he had a really long face like really long
Speaker 9prioritizing food on your table a really small forehead so you gotta be proportionate with a.
Speaker 1With a like his eyes were like pretty close too, oh yeah do y'all want to hang out and friend boy come over, or no?
Speaker 2hey, or do you want us to just go?
Speaker 6home or done now he's gonna be on this what's her name?
Speaker 3well, we'll probably wrap up we got our, we got our tiktok bachelors and and then we'll close out the show.
Speaker 11So oh yeah, wait, but there's a friend boy. How does that work? Oh no, it's still opening for the market I'm polyamorous.
Speaker 6Oh, are you probably who? I don't know polyamorous polyamory good morning.
Speaker 9Julia material that's my period.
Speaker 5Let's hang out got a big beaver free country, man big beaver not, do you got a big beaver Free country man, she's got a big beaver.
Speaker 6Do you not? Do you got a big beaver? Uh-uh, that's how.
Speaker 11I found her. Yes, how many pounds is it?
Speaker 6Two shacks Ah Roasts, oops.
Casual Banter and Comedic Antics
Speaker 5Oops, I'm drilling George Foreman style George Foreman.
Speaker 12Mother's word.
Speaker 7She got the big one check this thing out. We got it loaded down with guys two wieners, we got everything we need.
Speaker 5Well, I guess the only thing he knows how to party, that's you, okay, so grab your favorite cider salad. Who knows, you know, maybe mother will let you. Mother Kiss the cook, kiss the cook Sexy.
Speaker 10He's definitely a taker.
Speaker 7Blessings, blessings.
Speaker 6He's so funny oh here we go, hey lady, if lady like a guy who'll give your lower lip lots of lovin.
Speaker 2I'm your what is he saying?
Speaker 6lower lips. Lovin, a proper lovin, no, your lower lips your lower lips a proper lovin talking about your beaver, your beaver. He's talking about your beaver. He has that nose, I mean.
Speaker 11I think that's thank you well it could be a compliment like hey, what's in there? Hey, ladies.
Speaker 3If you're looking for a guy that'll give you lower lips of lovin'.
Speaker 11I don't like it.
Speaker 3How about this?
Speaker 1How about Elvis Joe I feel like that's your mom's boyfriend.
Speaker 10Fucking dead Ricky Hi.
Speaker 6Richard, he's got a shovel, ricky Richard he's got a shovel it's hooked to his glass hold on
Speaker 3is that our dad cleaning out that one room? Is that why it's taking him so long?
Speaker 6no, that's why he's taking him so long. One for the money, two for the show, one for the money.
Speaker 3No, that's why he's shimmying. He's trying to stay up. One for the money, two for Joe.
Speaker 8Joe what?
Speaker 5are you talking about Glasses? What Sexy.
Speaker 11Why are these guys single? They should be first dibs.
Speaker 3Okay.
Speaker 1Thank you, thank you so much, yes, yes.
Speaker 5Looks like you caught me jamming.
Speaker 3He really likes Taylor Ew.
Speaker 5Ooh Taylor. He really likes Taylor. Ew, ooh Taylor.
Speaker 11He likes talking to her lower lips.
Speaker 5I like it, I like it, I like it, I like it, I like it, I like it, I like it, I like it, I like it, I like it, I like it, I like it, I like it, I like it.
Speaker 4I like it.
Speaker 5He's stuck in with that bandana right there, but she still doesn't end with the band, so I guess she's getting backstage passes.
Speaker 8You know who that reminds?
Speaker 5me of. So if you're interested in a night at a rock show, okay.
Speaker 6He has a mouth like that.
Speaker 5Do a little air guitar during the guitar cells. Make it look like we're the ones playing.
Speaker 6That sounds good, we've got plans.
Speaker 5Tokyo.
Speaker 11Oh my God.
Speaker 6Yo, not the Tokyo, not the tune in Tokyo.
Speaker 11Oh, remember what I said.
Speaker 6What do you call it? The tune in Tokyo? What do you call it? Maybe Japanese radio, japanese?
Speaker 5radio. It was good living with you, oh you better radio.
Speaker 8It was good we're living with you yo that forearm though she's in four arms, look at that who's he?
Speaker 6talking to right now his mom his mom boy boy.
Speaker 7I am Cobras. Cobras and babies will tear you up what's his tiger shirt?
Speaker 11I like how he fights, watch right here whoa he's Roger as the punk me he's a robot, he's not a robot.
Speaker 6You don't think I'm. He's a killing machine. I don't know, he's a rock and roll robot.
Speaker 7He's a killing machine.
Speaker 11He's a killing machine.
Speaker 8Oh yes, Baby, you're my angel. You're just a false man.
Speaker 3For our first date. I'm taking a couple stairs. The humidity in here went down.
Speaker 8Hey, he's mental health as a priority Is this.
Speaker 3Guy Fieri Fuck your chicken sandwiches. Guy, fuck you. Guy Fuck you.
Speaker 8Guy.
Speaker 3It's a cute dress. Oh, thank you. Wonder what it would look like on my floor, nice Floor of my trailer.
Speaker 5Park next to the river.
Speaker 7Cumberland River, love the name Cumberland. Cumberland River, love the name.
Speaker 11Cumberland, cumberland First three letters.
Speaker 8That's why Nice Cumberland.
Speaker 6Cumberland. We didn't get it. Oh, clifton, clifton, oh Clifton, you pick up girls fast oh.
Speaker 11It's like that, granny.
Speaker 6Is he a down center?
Speaker 9Maybe, maybe Not. It's like that, granny.
Speaker 11Not with those moves.
Speaker 8Nice Clifton, oh no.
Speaker 7Let me know if you're a sexy animal and I will let others know as well If you would like me to. Alright later, y'all.
Speaker 3Yes.
Speaker 6Find the stop button Nice, like me too. Alright, later y'all.
Speaker 7Yes, what Find the stop?
Speaker 8button Nice. Let me know if you're a sexy animal and I'll let others know too.
Speaker 11He's tall, wow, he's tall. Look how tall he is compared to the door. The door is so small Yo, that's a full hand. The door is so small Yo, that's a full hand. That's a thrusting machine. You saw that it's tiny, it's a big ass, motherfucker.
Speaker 3Smooth corner right there. That dude was super tall. Or what kind of shit was he built out of that?
Speaker 8was a tree house or something. He had a tree house or something.
Speaker 6Jesus oh.
Speaker 8Does he have a wrist brace? I couldn't.
Speaker 3What's happened to Matt Carpenter? Oh? No, oh no, or is that their buddy, mikey? I can't tell.
Speaker 10I can't tell either.
Speaker 8Oh no.
Speaker 6The only thing he brings to the table is his criminal record. Yikes Yo who's that oh damn See who's this though, who is it Alex and Chase?
Speaker 1Oh damn, see those boots, though. What was it? Alex and Chase, alex and Chase Hell yeah, look at those hips, they're good.
Speaker 8No hip replacements, ow, oh, I mean.
Speaker 6Wow, wow, hey move's pretty good.
Speaker 11That's a lot of moves.
Speaker 6Oh boy, yes, he's on it Less.
Speaker 8Oh boy, yes, he's on it.
Speaker 5With the election going on, I thought I would take this opportunity just to formally announce my candidacy.
Speaker 4For your heart.
Speaker 5For your lover. I'm hoping to become your chief romance officer. Chief romance officer I'm running on the platform of long walks on sandy beaches, whoa Lots of dinners at reasonably priced restaurants oh okay, reasonably priced, uninterrupted eye contact Ew. I'm cast about by just giving me the old what was that.
Speaker 11Can you do it one more time? Can you go?
Speaker 6back, please go back, please go back.
Speaker 11I'm loving this. I look forward to taking office.
Speaker 5Taking office I'm Steven Stevenson. I approve this message.
Speaker 3Steven Stevenson you wouldn't even have to change your last name.
Speaker 1That's easy that's true, oh, winky man.
Speaker 8Winky man, he's my favorite. He's back got it yo that hair though that mustache.
Speaker 10Hey, he's back, got it. Yo Got hair, though Got mustache.
Speaker 6Ah, oh, I thought you grabbed a snipple.
Speaker 9Oh, thank you.
Speaker 3I get it, I would leave me for him.
Veterans' Memories and Military Humor
Speaker 4Is it a man or a woman? I would leave me for him. Is it a man or a?
Speaker 3woman.
Speaker 11I might leave you for him.
Speaker 4That's testosterone coming out of his ears.
Speaker 3Hit me up, buddy, I want to try your nuts.
Speaker 10Ew.
Speaker 3There's a ton of them Ew.
Speaker 12Yes, that winky.
Speaker 3Tease winch, do it again do it again.
Speaker 4Oh, I'm about to buzz all right, there we go I love him so much.
Speaker 6Who's the winner?
Speaker 11so what's what's the winner? Who's the winner? Blessings, I think.
Speaker 8Blessings.
Speaker 9I think.
Speaker 2Mess shirt Mess shirt those hips.
Speaker 8Those hips don't lie, I can see the nips.
Speaker 1I think the hips broke.
Speaker 3I don't know he's getting it, he's got some nice boots. He'll probably let you borrow them.
Speaker 11Maybe I do like boot skating those boots look like from the human centipede Bites him. Human centipede, you've seen it.
Speaker 6We've seen all of them Freaks, we gotta do a better job.
Speaker 3Centipede, you've seen it? Oh yeah, we've seen all of them, freaks.
Speaker 6I'm so concerned we gotta do a better job of vetting our guests on the show Freaks.
Speaker 1You didn't do the background check no.
Speaker 3We don't have a budget for that. What's?
Speaker 11that You're getting paid. I got these.
Speaker 6I got these. They're just doing compensate exams at the door Prestige.
Speaker 3I got these snacks on credit, man oh damn Credit, damn Fucking.
Speaker 11Discovered for me. Thanks Obama, Not Discovered.
Speaker 3Yeah, thanks, Obama. Well, what are you going to do on this Veterans Day holiday?
Speaker 11I was going to say grill, but I don't have a grill.
Speaker 4Oh.
Speaker 3I know somebody that has a George Foreman.
Speaker 6Oh yeah, Blessings.
Speaker 3Blessings Loaded up with all kinds of dowels.
Speaker 1I'll be honest.
Speaker 11I think we might go to the 45th Infantry Museum, that's cool, our grandpa's in there.
Speaker 1They do a really cool ceremony and they do a great ceremony.
Speaker 11One of my favorite parts is they put All the songs. So whatever song you belong to, you stand up and everybody claps for you.
Speaker 4I always enjoy it.
Speaker 11You see the old timers, you're like Get up there and everybody claps for you. I always enjoy it. You see, the old timers, you're like barely came and you're like yes, get up there, Basically. Get up there. So that's the plan, unless it's like zero degrees, which I don't want.
Speaker 6I don't want. Is it supposed to be cold?
Speaker 11I don't know, but every year on Veterans Day it's super cold.
Speaker 3I will be. What are you going to do? I will be planted on my couch, yes, and I'm going to watch my favorite movies. Nice 13 hours Nice 13 hours Got to watch that, the Benghazi story. If you haven't watched it, go watch it. It's great. And then probably American Sniper oh, that's a good one.
Speaker 6Lone Survivor, maybe, maybe.
Speaker 3It could be Shooter.
Speaker 4Shooter's a good one, I really like.
Speaker 3Shooter. I think I would watch Shooter before Lone Survivor. That might be a good one. Will you save Shooter's? A good one. I really like Shooter. I think I would watch Shooter before Lone Survivor.
Speaker 6That might be a good one. Will you save Shooter?
Speaker 11What about Enemy Behind, behind, emily, behind.
Speaker 9Emily.
Speaker 6Behind Emily.
Speaker 1Behind Emily's lines.
Speaker 6Yikes, we'll do that.
Speaker 4Monday night.
Speaker 3Thank you for your service. Who the fuck is Emily? We're going to role play. You're Emily.
Speaker 6Well, we'll do that Monday night. Thank you for your service. Who the fuck is Emily?
Speaker 3Thank you for your service. Who the fuck? Is Emily we're going to role play. You're Emily and I'm. You've got to wear the wig the line. The line.
Speaker 6The line.
Speaker 4There you go, Wait no, oh, oh.
Speaker 6No, he's behind my back. Oh, oh, oh yeah we don't. You're Emily, who's?
Speaker 3Emily here.
Speaker 6You have the wig.
Speaker 3Yeah, it's going to be like we're going to reenact being at MEPs again. That's what we're going to do Kinky?
Speaker 11Hey, did you have the same experience that I had when you did your MEPs?
Speaker 3Or was it as comfortable? So get through everything else and then the last spot you go into this little office and I think it had a door here and a door here, so it was like this, and then you went out. Anyway so I go in and he's like, okay, do you remember smells.
Speaker 9Ew sterile.
Speaker 3Can you do the duck walk?
Speaker 1Oh yeah, I remember that one.
Speaker 8Oh, the duck walk.
Speaker 3So, I did the duck walk, whatever he had me do, some other stupid shit, and then it was the okay, now I need you to undress. And I was just like okay, all right, oh, wow, I did whatever and yeah, the whole little, and then, and then he was like now I need you to. He might have said about face, maybe even whoa, and I went okay okay and then I need you to reach down and grab your ankles and give me a hard cough oh, give you a hard cough.
Speaker 3Oh, give you a hard cough.
Speaker 1Not a soft one, a hard one.
Speaker 11I did Good on you See, I failed, I did.
Speaker 3I think I just like disassociated from everything when.
Speaker 7I was in there Happy place.
Speaker 3I want to do this, so I guess I got to do this to get there.
Speaker 11I was thinking the whole entire time. Does this make?
Speaker 7me gay no.
Speaker 3But then I remember getting to me and my brother Dan talked about this the other day there's like you, you go to this company or this battalion. No, I think it's a company, this little welcoming unit. Before we go to our actual training unit in BASIC, we're at this place. I want to say somewhere in there we had to go get all of our shots, oh yeah. And it was in the gun that had like 74 needles.
Speaker 11I remember that one and I was like Next, next.
Speaker 3Okay. That was sore the next day and I had to take that and then it was a Okay, now pull down one pant, pull out one butt, cheek Penicillin. And then they had us like sit the other butt cheek on a table so we wouldn't tighten up our cheek, or fall. I don't know yeah.
Speaker 5Because you had someone pass out, didn't you?
Speaker 11Yeah, we had this guy called. His nickname was Rooster. It was because he was a redhead and man. He passed out, like they said, alcohol and the guy went not even with a shot. Oh my God.
Speaker 3I bet Dan did, because Dan hates needles.
Speaker 12Yeah, he does Like he's fucking.
Speaker 3I think he said he passed out, he did.
Speaker 4Maybe he's a big guy too.
Speaker 3Yeah, wow, yeah, he can't. We're losing. He'll never have a tattoo. No, oh, he can't come, he can't.
Speaker 7He can't, come he can't even look at it.
Speaker 3He can't even look at knitting needles. Knitting needles, yeah, knitting needles, I don, but the the best part about the military. One of the things that I used to do was, every time we had a random drug test, yeah, it was always early in the morning and I had to wake up earlier because I lived off post and so I hadn't taken that good morning shit yet. So when they were like, oh, you gotta go get in line for a drug test and you can't get out of this line, you had to poop.
Speaker 3And I said to the surgeons, they had to be the pecker checkers, the Peter watchers. I was like hey.
Speaker 6Peter peepers.
Speaker 11I'm turtling here, I'm turtling. I got to poop too. I got to poop, poop.
Speaker 3Because you have to sit there with the stall door open. Yeah, you have to pee, because you have to pee in the cup right there.
Speaker 8And they watch you poop.
Speaker 3They have to and I'm like, all right, all right, have fun, because infantry, mortar men, we're sick guys and all the guys watching us were probably support guys and we're like we're going to make you pay. So here you go, watch me, dookie as I pee in this little cup.
Speaker 1Damn it grows.
Speaker 11Boys are gross, so you've got to also admire the precision of pooping and peeing at the same time.
Speaker 10Girls do it all the time.
Speaker 11No no no, no, no, no, no no no no no, no, no, no, like you have to be a good shot. Well, yeah, you do have to like. I'm not saying that you guys aren't doing it.
Speaker 8No, I'm saying that like You've got to aim and your butthole can't go away.
Speaker 3And then always dribble a little bit on the outside of the cup. I mean they have gloves on, but it's like sorry dude.
Speaker 1Did you even get any in the cup? A little tart in there.
Speaker 8You want that too.
Speaker 6He's good, is this kind?
Speaker 3of sample, not that kind Spaghetti.
Speaker 7That's good. You need a stool sample. Is this kind of sample? Ew Ugh.
Speaker 3Not that kind Spaghetti, that's gross.
Speaker 6Shooting ropes. Go to the doctor.
Speaker 1Go to the doctor.
Speaker 10Shooting ropes. Shooting ropes.
Speaker 11Yo, so was that your favorite experience in the military?
Speaker 3No, no.
Speaker 11So if you, had a favorite memory, what would it be?
Speaker 1The whole time, no, just one.
Speaker 3Oh, that's tough. I think probably when our entire battalion went to a, we had to go do our rifle marksmanship qualification and I shot 40 out of 40 and was the only one in the battalion that did it.
Speaker 4Like a badass and then got an award for it later on Michael.
Speaker 11Yeah, marksman Dude, that's awesome.
Speaker 4Marksman.
Speaker 3Which 40 out of 40 was what I did all the time what's yours, oh mine like your favorite memory.
Speaker 11I don't, jessica, damn it, jessica. I guess my favorite memory I'm sorry I'm thinking too hard, I wasn't ready for it. Well, it's going to sound lame, I guess, but this is the best I could think of it's when I went to the chaplain and it was what our 10-year anniversary oh yeah, that was fun and and uh, we and I and I planned our 10-year anniversary to have, uh, our uh renewal vows yeah, on base on base and she didn't know, like I, we bought her dress, everything.
Speaker 11And she came in and the chaplain, like I was like oh, let's, let me show the chaplain. She's like okay, and literally everybody was there. And then she's like what's going on? I'm like, hey, go into that room, change, we're gonna renew our love house. And she's like what? I guess that's the best memory, yeah yeah yeah I mean, and I was, I wearing my uniform.
Speaker 3Best memory of the military really has not much to do with the military.
Speaker 7That's fair. Okay, that's fine.
Speaker 11But it was Family. Oh, and that was after I learned how to re-walk again, so I was trying to figure it out.
Speaker 6Yeah, a lot of his military was spent recovering from surgery.
Speaker 10So it was fuzzy.
Military Training and Sniper School Experience
Speaker 6That was not good times.
Speaker 3Yeah, and then, man, I do have quite a bit. So I was so proficient in marksmanship that they would have me two lanes over. They would have me two lanes over and we would have a soldier trying to qualify for ranger school or airborne no, not airborne Something. Special forces.
Speaker 4Mm-hmm.
Speaker 3But their marksmanship was awful Also you needed help you needed help, you need to help call.
Speaker 3So I shot two lanes over just to help them at their targets. Wow. And then there was one range we would go to all the time and I noticed, like the hundred meter target and the 250 meter target, their shoulders just barely overlapped and I was like I wonder if I can shoot both of them with one round. Did you ever try? Because these were pop-up targets and then they would do singles and then they would do doubles, and so I did it and both of them went down. And then that came around again knocked them both down. So when we got done, I shot 40 out of 40. And then at the end, when they did a brass and ammo check, I said, hey, I have rounds left. They're like what? Like I got two rounds left. You shot 40 out of 40. How do you have rounds left? I said I could take two down With one shot, with one.
Speaker 3They were like bullshit, I'll do it again you said dude, and so he sent me back out Two rounds left over Dang. So I was very good in that. In fact, my first award was in basic for having the highest basic rifle marksmanship score out of the entire training battalion Whoa. And that time I only shot like 37 or 38 out of 40. I hadn't even gotten better yet. So I got better after that and then every time it was 40 out of 40.
Speaker 11So so if you had to do it again, would you go to like sniper school or anything like that?
Speaker 3Funny story about that. Okay, when guys say I want to go home, home, and yeah, casey, did you do that? Okay, okay, uh, I want to go home and beat the shit out of my recruiter, yeah, you know, guys say that. So I walked into the recruiter's office and I said I want to enlist in the army, I want to be a sniper, so let's go. And he said, well, you saw, you uh sign up as uh infantry, there's a bonus.
Speaker 3So I don't know, I got like 15, 20 grand guys, we're gonna pay or something, yeah, and then um he said, and then when you get to basic, they will ask you what school you want next, and then you'll.
Speaker 11That's how they got you.
Speaker 3I was like. And so I was like yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So when we did get to our training battalion, they did say are there any schools you would like to go to? And you write those down, but they don't. Maybe maybe guys going to airborne school or air assault school, maybe they would do that. That's all I wanted to do. So I just put sniper and they were like 11 Charlies, don't go to sniper school, motherfucker. Well, I'm here.
Speaker 3And then at my duty station in Germany, there was something like they were having like a mock sniper school and they had all these different battalions having people qualify for it. Well, yeah, I'm going to do that. My rifleman score is fucking better than anybody. So, yeah, let me do it. There was an infantry guy. He might have been an 11 Charlie, I don't know. Infantry mortarman, that's what I was but he had gotten hurt at somewhere, so he was working in the personnel office. He sent his packet in.
Speaker 4Yeah, for the company, not me oh, of course they weren't going to choose him you're hurt, you're a broke dick.
Speaker 3You're a broke dick, yeah, and so that screwed me out of that. And then, uh, I get to fort irwin, california, after I re-enlist, and then, uh, there was like a commander's inspection or something, so we had to clean all the vehicles and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah oh, make sure you have all your gear, all your tools, everything spread out yeah and they just look at oh my bad they look at it and you're like, yeah, come on, it's an
Speaker 3old ordeal thing. I was kind of new to the platoon and I was. I was recovering from my hernias but I was kicking all of their asses in like rifleman scores, um, and then on our mortar systems we would have gunner tests and so you would have to qualify on your mortar equipment and I was beating their top guy. And that is all because of my platoon in germany and how hard we trained, hated it at times, right, but we trained fucking hard. We, we all knew our fucking job. That's awesome. And so I get to fort erwin, california, which is a big training base I think it's NTC and so we play the OPFOR, the opposing force, and all the other fighting forces come to NTC to do like laser tag battles, war with the OPFOR, war games so they could train. Yeah, war games with the op war games so they could train.
Speaker 3Yeah, war games. Well, I'm not sure how hard they trained on their mortar systems, but maybe that's why I was kicking all their asses. But they hated it because I was still on light duty getting to the platoon, cause I came off a hernia surgery, hernia surgery.
Speaker 3I was hurting really bad, not knowing that that repair had failed. Oh, and I still had one on the other side. So I had two hernias this whole time. When I got back, when I got to, when I got to california, fort irwin, and I was beating these guys and they fucking hated it.
Speaker 3And so, anyway, we have this commander's inspection, or whatever they called it our vehicle. The commander was like this this has been the best fucking like everything's Squared away Squared away. If there was perfect, it would have been this and then. But that squad leader had me sitting away from them at the back of the vehicle, sitting away from them at the back of the vehicle, and we had so we were mechanized infantry and our mortar systems were mounted in these little armored personnel carriers, little bitty tank things. They were standing at that the back ramp, and I was. They had me off somewhere else, like out of sight, out of mind, and that commander but I could still overhear that commander was asking them kind of as like a reward, I guess yeah, like what kind of school you guys want to go to? Oh shit, and we'll see about getting you qualified and getting you.
Speaker 3And I was like motherfucker I could have you know.
Speaker 11There goes another opportunity.
Speaker 3There goes another opportunity.
Speaker 11Shit.
Speaker 3Yeah, but whatever Damn.
Speaker 5Yeah.
Speaker 3Damn dude.
Speaker 11Well, that's pretty awesome.
Military Training Memories and Comedic Antics
Speaker 3Yeah, I mean I don't really like to brag about anything I did in the military. Which pills in comparison to a lot of other veterans?
Speaker 11Yeah, dude, like pills, wearing the hat, wearing all their medals, and you're like dude, shut the fuck up.
Speaker 3Oh, I know, shut the fuck up Be humble, but the one thing I will be.
Speaker 6Those are the ones that don't have any.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 6Because the people who have things are quiet about it.
Speaker 3Yeah, the one thing I will be very confident about. And anybody challenged me in rifle marksmanship, I will say Game on. I want you to know that it may not be fair. That's awesome Because I have a supernatural ability.
Speaker 11You're like look at my nutsack Dude, that's awesome.
Speaker 3Yeah, wow, there's so many things like that, just little moments that happen. We did this thing one time. Our platoon had this training area kind of up in the small little mountain area and we were doing um mount training, um, where you're battling in buildings and small towns, and we had the laser tag kind of set up what do they call those?
Speaker 3I don't remember. I thought I had it but I didn't. Anyway, we they had these berms surrounding this little town. That was built out, huge berm, and we start to go over and on one of the buildings at the very top they had a mounted like probably uh 60 and so it was like we started taking fire.
Speaker 3So we get back down and as we're doing that, I could see that if we barely come up over the berm, he can't see us, and it had. It was winter time and so it was. It was snowy, so I was like, hey, we need to crawl up, we need to low crawl up and slide down on our bellies and we'll make it to the first building and this guy won't see us. They were like okay, okay.
Speaker 3So I was the first one. I said and I'll go first. And so we all get up there, I volunteer as tribute. We all start coming down. We had an NCO later say that was a fucking movie, because what happened, what we didn't know. They sent a guy on the outside of the berm. This guy was supposed to pin us down and this guy was coming around to flank us. Well, we came down.
Speaker 3This guy didn't see so when his buddy flanked came up, no, the m60 guy destroyed him friendly fire yeah, friendly fire took him out, and so the nco that saw us do that saw that and was like, oh yeah, dude, you're gone. They got you. And then we cleared the entire place.
Speaker 3Whoa, so that was cool, just be the tactics though I was a private new to the platoon and I was like hey, let's do this. And they said that was fucking a movie. And I was like man, no one had cell phones back then yeah, you know. And I guarantee somebody would have been recording that now.
Speaker 11Yeah. Right and we would have been able to see it for the future and people aren't like oh, you're fucking lying dude, that's awesome You're lying, no, but anyway, it's just little moments like that.
Speaker 3Yeah, like I even have. It was fun going through the gas chamber. Yeah, me too. I had a great time. I don't know why.
Speaker 11It too. I had a great time.
Speaker 4I don't know why it was awful. Yeah, you're not jewish. Yikes too soon, casey too soon.
Speaker 3I'm not quick enough, I gotta have it oh my god I'm probably right yeah well they weren. They didn't say let's go to the showers. They didn't say that. Yeah, but it was just funny, just like the snot and the stuff that just exits your body after that is insane.
Speaker 11See, when it happened to me when I went through the gas chamber, I didn't really have any like side effects at all. Like everybody, I'm just there and the, the, the trainer, like he grabbed the fan because this little fan and a little thing, and he just started pointing towards me because everybody's like you know they had to do something with this and and it yeah, from like behind your brain is just snot coming out and I'm just there going.
Speaker 11But at the same time I like spicy. Well, not only spicy, but what I was doing was I was slow, breathing, super slow. I was like, yeah, just tiny breaths, you know, and everybody and everybody. And of course I got a little bit teary. But once they said, okay, you know, you know, recite your social security number and your name, your name and last name, I said and they're like, well, you're too confident, you're you'll be the last one. And I'm like, okay, my last name is you. So what's new? So I'll sit in the back and my last name is you, so what's new?
Speaker 11so I'll sit in the back and looking like that, his choker on and everything. Yeah, everybody hold me. But uh, yeah, when I came out, like I just the you know the mask that you have, yeah, it was burning from the mask like the little seal. I was just a little bit tear and that's it. I was like, well, it's because you eat spice. I'm like I don't eat spicy seal. I was just a little bit teary and that's it. I was like, well, it's because you eat spice. I'm like I don't eat spicy.
Speaker 11But I was controlling you said I was controlling my breath the whole entire time. I'm like don't, don't, blink. That was such a fun day.
Speaker 3Yeah, it was fun, so fun. I don't know why, but the funny, one of the funniest things that I ever saw in the military was one of our last big things before we graduated. We had this huge field training exercise.
Speaker 3We road marched with all this gear mortar equipment for parts of it, and I don't know how far we rode march, but when we were done and we even had they, let us at least put tennis shoes on afterwards we were walking like old men. My feet have never hurt. Well, they hurt like that now if I walk too long and that's what reminds me of it Anytime I'm on my feet way too long. Just how they fucking burned and we're just so fucking. Your feet were so angry, you could feel the anger and we were walking around like old men, like, oh my God, okay, okay, yeah. And then we had to build and dig a huge mortar pit and dig a huge mortar pit and then the next morning all these guys were like I got to go to sick call.
Speaker 3Like just pussing out because it started to rain.
Speaker 2It was cold it was muddy.
Speaker 3It sucked, yeah, but there was no way I was doing that. But all these broke dicks that got into this.
Speaker 3Uh, this five ton um, oh, the medic uh to go to sick, call one of the ncos, one of the training guys, whoever it was, probably a drill sergeant, pulled a cs grenade, pin on a cs grenade and just tossed it into the. Because this is wartime, we're simulating wartime and everybody's dead. You're gonna play dead. You're gonna play dead and to see these broke dicks that were saying I can't walk, I can't do anything jumping out and moving fast.
Speaker 3Oh my God, that shit was comical. Wow, I was like that's exactly why I didn't do that. Are you guys fucking dumb? They've been fucking with us the whole time. Yeah, you think they're not going to? This is wartime right here. You don't think someone's going to fuck with you? You're fucking dumb. Go to the Marines. I'm just kidding.
Speaker 11We had to stay up for I think it was 72 hours, oh yeah. And after that we had to do our war game, our simulation, and it was a ship. We were in this giant ship, but it's all like a roller coaster ride and it was a simulation of a ship sinking, oh shit. So they put me as my job was to be a plumber and I had like about 10, 18 year olds and I'm like, ok, you know, I'm 26. I'm like, let's go, like let's go do our duties and all that stuff. I was the line leader, whatever. And you know, you know line leader whatever.
Speaker 11And you know, incoming missile brace for impact. And then the ship starts sinking and they're like, hey, you, you need to go fix damages. So of course I go down with the team and the instructor. They're watching us and they're like, okay, figure it out. And there's pipes everywhere. And they're watching us and they're like, okay, figure it out, and there's pipes everywhere and they're leaking. And I was like, okay, well, we gotta start fixing the holes and we start gonna start redirecting the water supply so we don't drown. Well, when I started doing that, the tuner said oh, you got shot, so now you gotta stand on the side and let these guys take care yeah, so I'm going.
Speaker 11What like? We had a plan, like we like water was like up our boot. We were good. By the time we were done, water was at our neck. Great Lakes water, cold as hell. These idiots. They didn't know what lefty, righty, tighty, they didn't understand any of that. And I'm just going like, oh my god, these idiots. But enjoyed the experience, hated the experience.
Speaker 4Enjoyed it.
Speaker 3upon reflection, I think ours at the end was a live fire exercise where we it was night and we had to move infiltrate an area and there was barbed wire, mud water that we had to low crawl under.
Speaker 11Don't they shoot like over your head.
Speaker 3Yeah, they were shooting, right, and you could see the tracers. Now I don't know how high they were shooting, and people will tell you stories. Oh yeah, the man last training cycle had a guy stand up, took his head right off. Now you don't know if those things are true, right, yeah. But when you're down there crawling and it's, you hear the whip and you see the tracers flying by, you're like I don't want to test how high those rounds go. Yeah, so I'm just going to stay down here, yeah.
Speaker 11Crawl in the mud, suck it up. I kind of want to embrace the suck.
Speaker 3Yeah, exactly, whoa. Yeah, that's pretty cool yeah I mean where else are you gonna do shit like that? Yeah, you know what I mean yeah, no, I.
Speaker 11I when people say like what, what is? One of the one of those experiences that you've had that you cannot have it anywhere else was being right next to a jet landing on a carrier and you're just feet away and you just feel that torque going through your body and how everything just moves one holy crap.
Speaker 11That that is you think of we. There's a reason why we are the the top of the food chain because the amount of stuff that was happening during that time, I'm like, oh my god, I could die. But at the same time, like you said, when you train and train and train, you're like, hey, yellow, white I mean well, white and red, don't cross it, okay, because that could be your leg or your head or whatever you know. So I will say that that's being in the carrier. Yeah, I remember like for two weeks I couldn't figure out where I was.
Speaker 11Yeah, I'm like, what the hell am I? I'm like, so I would go out and they have floors. If they're blue, those are the officer floors. But what I would do is I would walk through them and they're like hey, what the hell are you doing here? I was like, oh, I'm looking for Mr Smith. You know his aircraft, we need him to like check it out. Well, what are you doing talking to me? I'm sorry, you know, but I would say those excuses, because they will never like. You know, well, there's there's like 5000 people in there, so it's not like they're going to go find that one person there.
Speaker 11Yeah, you know, if you could go. Hey, man, I don't know where it is, You're not going to go around the carrier trying to find that one dude, right? You know, I remember one time I opened a door and there was the military police with their rifles. And when I opened it they're like hey you hang on. I closed that door and I booked it. Yeah, no, Nope. When they say hey, hey, come here.
Speaker 5They don't speak English.
Speaker 3No, what what?
Speaker 11How did I get here In those ships there?
Speaker 10was tons of there's a cruise ship. I'm looking Carnival. What?
Speaker 9buffet Carnival.
Speaker 11No, they had a buffet, oh yeah.
Speaker 3So those experiences you're talking about being right next to the jet got two like that. Two examples Field training exercise in Germany, wintertime, cold as shit. The best place was to stand behind an m1 abrams, no matter how much exhaust you were breathing in the co2. It was so fucking warm, really like there could be snow all behind it and within a minute seconds all that snow is melted. That's just how much heat's coming, Cause it's a jet turbine.
Speaker 11Yeah.
Speaker 3In a Abrams and you want to talk about million dollars worth of personnel heater was right there. You can see all the infantry guys standing behind the tank going oh my God, I don't care about those powdered eggs, I'm fucking warm. Finally, and then, when my platoon deployed to Kosovo, we had to do this thing and I don't know if I was chosen or I just volunteered I was like I'm never going to be able to do this again. I don't know if I was chosen or I just volunteered. I was like I'm never going to be able to do this again. But we were combat loading a Humvee to a Chinook helicopter, and so I was the guy that stood on top of the Humvee with a grounding rod that had to have the Chinook helicopter lower down right above me Hook it so I could start touching it to ground it out, because the static.
Speaker 3Okay, guys, we're good. Yikes, Can we get this thing hooked up? Can we hurry?
Speaker 9please yeah.
Speaker 11My first job was to be a plane captain. I was the one who would tell you know, hey, you know it, we always had that one person volunteering usually wasn't a person who had a high iq level. We would have not saying that you have one. No, no, no, no, no, but this is navy. We had that one designated volunteer. You know I would go like, hey, you know, we gotta ground it because the amount of static electricity that's in the air is gonna to shock somebody and kill them. And I remember I'm doing all the hand signals and everything and I'm like, dude, if this guy dies, better him than me, you know.
Speaker 9Tee hee, tee hee yeah.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Military Service and MRE Memories
Speaker 11The other thing, about Kosovo.
Speaker 6No, I love it. Committed to the character at this point.
Speaker 3No, I love it. Committed to the character thing about, uh, kosovo too, being on deployment was the chow hall was open like 24 7 and there were days we got king crab legs and like mongolian barbecue and stuff and the defect had the best chicken wings ever. Wow, we would go at like two in the morning if we were still up just to go get chicken wings. Whoa. But then also when you had to do laundry, you dropped it off. What?
Speaker 3And these local national ladies would go do your laundry, and then you would get it back.
Speaker 7Fold your little pants Perfectly folded, underwear folded, socks folded, would go do your laundry and then you would get it back perfectly perfectly folded.
Speaker 3Yeah, underwear folded, socks folded. I was like I never want to go home, I just want to stay here. Yeah, the locals will like food all the time we could also on the outside of our um, what do they call them? Sea huts? This is what they called them. I think on the outside of the door we could put a list of like drinks, juice, pops that we wanted in our fridge and they'd have a little local, national guy come around, take the things go shopping.
Speaker 3for us it was like Walmart, plus Yo Walmart delivery, and they would bring it in and stock our fridge. We come back at the end of the day and it was like Mountain Dew's Dr Peppers, do you?
Speaker 6think they were hired by the military to help you guys out.
Speaker 3Oh sure, because they were probably more hired by a contractor. So we had a contractor called Brown and Root, similar to Halliburton, and I bet they were hired probably from them.
Speaker 6I mean, it gave them jobs and stuff. I mean you know and and like some corottery between like the military like the locals and stuff like that.
Speaker 3I mean that's a good thing to do and the brown and root guys when we had to do maintenance on our vehicle. We do our preventative maintenance, so it was like oh man the oil. Change the oils a court low. Even if the oil was a court low, hey, what do I do? Take it over to Brown and root, so drive over there wait for and you're just waiting for them to put a quarter oil in and you drive back.
Speaker 11That's awesome.
Speaker 3It was great, that's awesome. It was great, that's awesome. Those brown and root guys and the local nationals got paid in cash. So my platoon was the qrf team for qr for quick reaction force for kosovo and the surrounding area. One of our missions we would get would be to transport guys, plainclothes, guys with like mp5s briefcase, actually handcuffed to their wrist, because they paid all their people. They paid their people in cash, the local national people.
Speaker 3We were escorting millions upon millions of dollars in cash and I want to say they're like just just a little bit just like we're talking, god, if you love me on average maybe like 17 to $20 million in fucking cash, and so we would either do them by Blackhawk or we would do them by convoy. I always loved the convoy because and we trained this I mean we're bumper to bumper, yeah, and if any car tries to break into the convoy line we're in up-armored Humvees. So I don't know a few tons and I had a little car try to come in and you wouldn't have to even hit it very hard. It's a little compact car. Dude would just go flying Not today.
Speaker 11And you think they know better. You will think, see, if I see a convoy, I'm like I'm just going to step aside and just watch who goes by.
Speaker 3And I've told this story before but.
Speaker 3I was the driver Squad leader wanted me driving, so I was the driver and I would want to roll with the windows up sometimes and I'd blast the AC and he'd be like I don't think it's fucking cold. I was like, dude, do you know how hot it is out there? Anyway, but another reason we would also write windows down is if you take any fire. Well, even that armored door is still hollow, and so you had the ballistics glass in the windows and so you put that glass also in the door. Oh yeah, so you put that glass in the window, all the time It'll stop them.
Speaker 3Is the round going to come through the window? I don't know. It's a small target. Depending on the distance. It's going to hit the body of the vehicle more than anything. But they also had traffic lights and parts of like Macedonia and if we had to stop we'd have these kids rush the vehicle and they would grab anything off you. So you had to dummy cord everything to you because they would just come in reaching for everything.
Speaker 3Well, our lieutenant at the time loved atomic fireballs, the candy, and we would have those on us all the time and when those kids came to we would be like, hey, have some candy, and they take this candy and we we drive off. Well, that worked, because anytime we stopped at those lights we'd look over those kids would not approach the vehicle and we were like hey, and they'd be like, oh, the vehicle. And we'd be like hey, and they'd be like, oh, it burns. But there was one camp we would go to in Macedonia. I don't remember why we would go there, but anyway they had this little sister and brother that was kind of outside the gate, that was always around and they were sweet kids. We gave them fireballs, oh, and we watched them from the Humvee and at first they were like, and then, and then I take it out and their drool would hit the ground and it was like they were so hungry that they oh no.
Speaker 3And we would give those kids water and MREs and all kinds of stuff.
Speaker 11Hey, talking about MREs, Do you remember what are you doing? Do you remember when you eat an MRE, like the first stump right after, oh yeah, solid, the pain, the pain.
Speaker 3Solid. Oh yeah, dude, they're made to plug you up. It was a log.
Veterans Day Appreciation Celebration
Speaker 11They are made to plug you up for a bit oh man, I remember the first time I had one, I was like, oh you know, I don't know what was your favorite one. Mine was the Fittipino Alfredo and it was just sauce, sauce, and noodles.
Speaker 3Favorite one.
Speaker 3I don't know. I think I got to the point and some people didn't like them, but they had this thing just called a ham slice. To the point, and some people didn't like them, but, uh, they had this thing just called a ham slice. I've heard about ham slice big chunk of ham and weird gelatin, but it was just. It was so easy to eat like you could. You could eat. It be done cold, it was okay. You could warm it up. That was probably it. We would figure out which ones had the jalapeno cheddar cheese with the crackers. Oh boy, yeah, you might just fight over some fucking jalapeno cheese.
Speaker 6That right. There is how I know I would not have made it in the military.
Speaker 5Really.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 7MREs.
Speaker 2Fucking MREs? No way, bro. Wait did the Air Force? Yeah, mres Fucking.
Speaker 7MREs, no way.
Speaker 3Wait, did the.
Speaker 7Air Force have to eat MREs Probably not Probably at times.
Speaker 3Sometimes maybe I bet not.
Speaker 11You're a fucking nut. Maybe at times I bet they're MREs. Depending on their job, I'm assuming.
Speaker 6Delicates.
Speaker 11Delicates. Well, you know, once you have one, you're good to go who?
Speaker 1Well, I have to ask my dad hey dad, did you have MREs he?
Speaker 3did. Well, let's wrap this bitch up. We've been going three hours, now Three. Let's wrap it up. It was fun, bro. Whoa, hey, whoa. Is that dick size, dick size. Anyway hey, veteran veteran, to all the other veterans out there, thank you for your service.
Speaker 11Veteran, thank you for your service and everybody who supports supports the military.
Speaker 3Good job, anya. Hope you guys have a good veterans day holiday do whatever you want to go to the 45th infantry museum or whatever.
Speaker 11Hope you guys have a good Veterans Day holiday.
Speaker 3Do whatever you want to Go to the 45th Infantry Museum or whatever military museum may be near you or be safe.
Speaker 11Stay home.
Speaker 3Or stay home, get couch locked and watch war movies. I know for guys that sometimes it's a calming effect when we watch those. It's kind of weird. I had to explain it to Casey. But do that, do what you want. Vets on Veterans Day within reason it's your day. It's your day. Your motherfuckers earned it, just like we earned it, so I'm just glad I now have the day off.
Speaker 11Thank you for your service. Thank you for your service.
Speaker 3Thank you for your service.
Speaker 7Thank you for your service. Thank you for being a dependent. Hell yeah, hell yeah, yeah yeah. Favorite life.
Speaker 3Thank you. If you watch the YouTube live stream. I don't know, we know Justin did, yeah, he's a future veteran, hey, but I think it worked and we may do this more, so maybe I give people more of a heads up next time we do it. Anyway, thank you for watching or listening. We'll catch you next time. Ciao, baby.
Speaker 11That was awesome.
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